Soldier
by RiverDoe
Summary: A few years after graduating, Xander returns to the Hellmouth. Only things don’t seem to be right, as his friends soon find out. Complete.
1. Chapter One

Summary: A few years after graduating, Xander returns to the Hellmouth. Only things don't seem to be right, as his friends soon find out. PG13 for mild language and violence.

Disclaimer: Nope, not mine, although there might be a couple of minor OCs that are mine. Xander, Buffy, Willow and anyone else from the series are NOT mine, they belong to Joss.

AN- This story was originally intended to be a darkfic, and focusses on an idea that I had at three o'clock in the morning two years ago. A 'What if?' scenario which shows a darker side of Xander unlike what is shown on the show. On an extra note, I have trouble writing Xander, usually whenever I write him he is really, really, really OOC, so this is kind of a test for me as previously I have left him mostly out of a story. Please review if you are reading, I love hearing from people. (Edited on 25/1/07)

**Soldier**

**Chapter One**

Somehow, it was good to be back.

Xander Harris couldn't help but smile as he drove into Sunnydale in the jet-black Toyota he'd acquired on the road. But when he glanced in the mirror, he decided thefull smiledidn't look right on his recently unshaven, slightly scarred face. Instead, he settled for a slight smile instead.

The town was mostly the same as it had been when he'd left, over three years ago. Some things, he thought, would never change. He cruised past several familiar haunts; the mansion, where Buffy had hid Angel for those few months so long ago; the Bronze, quiet in the early hours of the morning, most of the patrons either lying dead in the alleys behind the club or safe at home, wrapped tight in their covers; the high school, nothing but a complete wreck that no one had bothered to clean up, and eventually he found himself in territory he probably knew off the back of his hand, despite how long he'd been gone.

Giles' old apartment, he briefly considered knocking, but as it was four in the morning, he doubted the Watcher would actually want to hear from him, no matter how long he'd been away for. So he moved on and found that Willow's home had no lights on, and most of the windows had been boarded up anyway, so he couldn't actually tell if it had lights at all.

He stopped there and wandered what had happened. Where was Willow now? Was she okay? The house looked like no one had lived there in years. He climbed out of the car to investigate, but after twenty minutes of trying to wrestle the boards off the windows and enter, he gave up andheaded back to the car, silently wandering what had happened. He looked round before climbing into the car, something didn't feel right, but then again, in this town, nothing was ever right.

So lost in his thoughts, he didn't notice the teenager sneaking up along the sidewalk. Moonlight glinted off the pistol the youth held in both hands. Xander was looking the other way, out the passenger window and didn't notice the teen until he raised the weapon and cocked it.

"Get out of the car." The boy said, keeping his voice low.

Xander turned round in his seat to look at the boy. The teen was wearing t-shirts and jeans that were several sizes too big and had several chains around his neck. He seemed shifty as well, like he was waiting for something, or someone to attack or something. His eyes flicked all over the place before settling back on Xander again.

"Get out of the car." The kid repeated.

Xander resisted the temptation of rolling his eyes.

"I'll shoot!" The teen said, his voice slightly higher now. He glanced round again, nervousness seemed to come off him in waves.

"Okay, okay." Xander said, reaching for the door handle. He really did not need this shit right now. The teen stepped back slightly, and kept the gun level with Xander's head. Xander shoved the door open suddenly and grabbed the gun from the youth's hand as the door slammed against his stomach. The kid bent over in the open window and Xander flipped the gun over in his hands with the ease of someone used to handling such weapons.

The teen's eyes widened as he found himself staring down the barrel of his own gun. He gulped, raised his gaze and met the cool glare on Xander's face. His face was like stone when the teenager burst into tears, pleading with Xander not to kill him.

Xander whispered two words and pulled the trigger. "Too late."

He tugged the door away from the headless corpse and watched in disgust as it fell to the ground. He looked at the gun, contemplating for a second whether to keep it or not. It was a fine pistol, a Colt as well.

The weapon landed next to the corpse's hand a few moments later and Xander muttered under his breath as he drove off. "No one's going to take my baby away from me."

He didn't notice the vampire step out of the bush and look from the car that was swiftly disappearing into the night to the body in the middle of the road.

"Look's like there's a new player in town." He said, lighting a cigarette.

Tbc…


	2. Chapter Two

Disclaimer: Nope, not mine.

AN- Thanks to the three people who reviewed the first chapter. I really appreciate it. And I'm way too tired to talk any more, so here's chapter two.

**Soldier**

**Chapter Two**

It was well into the morning when Xander pulled up in front of 1630 Revello Drive. He'd found a small motel that was open just after five and had dropped off most of his stuff there. He'd then spent the rest of the night and some of the morning reacquainting himself with the town, and getting rid of some of its night-time population.

He took a deep breath and looked up at the front door. Now it was time to face some of the daytime citizens. A thought came to him as he started to climb out of his car.

What if Buffy didn't live there anymore?

He decided to go up and up and check anyway. He knocked a couple of times, and looked round at the plants growing in the outdoor plant pots and out at the rest of the street. Yep, it was the same as he remembered it. He didn't see the door open behind him and turned round as a voice asked, "Can I help you?"

Xander turned round to see a tall-ish man with sandy coloured hair standing in the doorway, frowning at him curiously.

"I'm er… looking for Buffy Summers," Xander told him. Theguy didn't look impressed so Xander tried again."She used to live here?"

"Riley!? Who is it?" A woman's voice called from upstairs. A voice that sounded suspiciously like Buffy's.

"What do you want?" Riley asked, his voice low, almost dangerous. Xander didn't know why, but everything about the man felt… off. From the way he was holding himself, glaring down at Xander even though they were roughly the same height, to the way he leaned against the doorframe, his stance threatening.

"I'm a friend." Xander offered, attempting to smile.

"Oh my God! Xander!!"

Xander looked up as Buffy descended the stairs and grinned at her. Riley stepped out of her way and she threw herself at Xander in a fierce hug. He almost suffocated under her strength – which he had almost forgotten about – before she seemed to remember how strong she was and let him go so that he could actually breathe.

"Are you okay?" She asked, concerned. He nodded, again smiling, only this time his smile broke into that goofy grin he'd always had in high school. She smiled back and reached for his arm. "Come on in."

Before he could follow, Riley grabbed her arm and leaned in close to her ear, although Xander could hear what he said.

"You don't know he's the same guy you used to know. He might be a---"

"If you say hostile, Riley Finn, I swear you'll never be able to speak again." Buffy hissed at him.

Xander raised an eyebrow at that, wandering exactly what this Finn had done. Riley stayed a moment, looking at Buffy, who was glaring back, before he turned and walked out of the house.

Buffy turned back to Xander with a smile, "Come on in."

As he entered the house, Xander noticed how much it hadn't really changed. The same pictures hung on the wall, the same smells hung in the air, and as Buffy led him through to the living room, he saw the same best friend he'd had as a kid and growing up.

Willow had been sitting in the armchair. She jumped up to greet him and he soon found himself enveloped in another hug, only one with not as much strength as Buffy.

"Oh my Goddess." Willow breathed when she'd let Xander go. "Xander?! Where've you been? How are you? What have you been doing?"

He grinned back at her, same old Willow. "I'm good." he answered, then frowned at her, concern laced his voice when he spoke again, and he wasn't sure how much of it was real. "But what's been going on here? I went to your house earlier, Will, and it looked like you've had some trouble."

Willow smiled at him, but to him it looked a little forced. "We had a little demon trouble. Luckily my parents were out of town when it happened."

"What kind of trouble?" he asked. She glanced at Buffy nervously. Out the corner of his eye he saw Buffy shake her head. Alarm bells rang in the back of Xander's mind. Something was definitely going on here.

"Come on through," Willow said, leading him to the couch as Buffy sat in the chair the redhead had vacated. "Sit."

Xander sat and smiled at his two old friends.

"D'you want a drink, I think we have tea, or beer if you want something stronger." Willow offered.

"I'm fine thanks," Xander told her. She looked crestfallen at that and sat back on the couch. Out the corner of his eye, Xander noticed Buffy glaring at him, but when he turned to look at her, she smiled at him. Oh yes, something was going on here.

"So," Xander grinned, trying to break into the strange silence that had settled over the room. "What's been going on?"

"You first." Willow replied, breaking into a smile again. "Where've you been? What have you been up to?"

He hadn't really been prepared for the question, but he managed to cover quite well. "I headed north after I left," he told them, glad of his ability to lie through his teeth,found a few bars and places to work. Anywhere that would generally accept me. Places that would only need me for a few days to help out, construction and decorating mostly. Then I'd move on, another city or town and start over again."

He was almost beginning to believe this story himself. And now was definitely time to change the subject, unless he let it slip what he had really been doing, which would not be good. For him or for them.

"So, what _has_ been going on around here?" he asked them, and watched with interest as they shared another look. Buffy glanced at the clock on the mantel and her eyes widened.

"Oh, I've got to get going, I'm late for class." She said hurriedly.

Xander raised an eyebrow as she stood and disappeared upstairs. She returned a moment later with a bag full of books and a coat over one arm.

"I'll see you later," she said to Willow, who smiled and nodded. Buffy flashed a brief smile Xander's way and disappeared through the front door before he could offer her a ride.

"It's okay," Willow said with a soft smile, as if reading his mind. "The college isn't that far."

Xander tried to return the smile, but failed and frowned at her. There was definitely something going on here, although what it was he could only guess at.

"Wills, what's been going on?" he asked quietly, his face set in a serious mask.

She glanced at him, then away again, holding his gaze for a fraction of a second before looking away, at the chair opposite, the lamp on the side. He knew she was avoiding the subject, and took her hands in his. She looked down at them and he raised a hand to tilt her chin up so that her eyes met his.

"Will, what's happened here?"

Willow took a deep breath, and she told him.

She told him about Buffy's brief relationship with Riley, and how he'd disappeared and come back a few months ago. She told him of her magic addiction, and how she'd been so far gone she'd almost destroyed the world, not once, but twice. And she also told him of Joyce Summers death.

He sat back, digesting all that he'd been told. These guys had probably been through more than he had. How long had he been gone? Way too long, his mind supplied, and everything's changed back here.

What did you expect? A voice inside him asked. You'd come back and everything would be back to normal again. The world doesn't work like that buster, you should know that by now.

"I don't know…" he muttered aloud.

Willow frowned at him. He'd been silent for almost an hour and cursed his subconscious mind when he saw the look on her face.

"I er… better get going," he said, standing up. His muscles were dead from sitting for so long, and he flexed them as he spoke. "I need to find a job or something, can't live on my savings forever."

He flashed her a brief smile and headed for the door. Willow's voice stopped him.

"You should come to the Bronze later," she said, standing as well. "We all meet there after school and stuff. You should come, meet the rest of the gang."

He grinned at her, "Sure. I'll be there. I think I remember where it is."

She smiled back and he headed outside. Willow closed the door softly behind him and he sat in his car for a minute, thinking. Maybe things could go back to the way they were. Oh, who was he kidding. They couldn't. He'd have to gain their trust again, when Willow had been talking to him, he'd got the feeling she still wasn't telling him everything.

But what was she hiding? He wandered as he drove off. Besides, he definitely needed to find a job if he was going to be staying in town. He'd have to worry about everyone'ssecrets later.

He spotted a construction site and pulled over. A few minutes later, he walked out of the site with a job and a promise to come back later in the afternoon. He returned to the motel to change into more suitable clothes.

The phone started ringing, he picked it up and held it close to his ear.

"Harris." A voice said.

"Yeah." Xander said, watching the windows for any sign of movement.

"Your next mark is Riley Finn." The person on the other end said, and then hung up.

Those guys, as usual, knew where to find him, and he disconnected and threw himself down on the bed. He'd not even been in town twenty-four hours and already they wanted him to kill someone. And not just anyone either, but the same Riley Finn who he'd seen today, he was sure of it.

This was going to be one hell of a long day.

Tbc...


	3. Chapter Three

Disclaimer in Chapter One, essentially though, most of the characters are not mine.

**Soldier**

**Chapter Three**

The Bronze was still mostly the same as Xander remembered it, or at least the location was. The same back-alleys where Buffy and the gang had followed vampires outside to kill them, where the gang had first met Faith, Spike… Memories of Buffy and Willow and even Giles had, on occasion, braved the teenage environment. There was a tonne of fond memories for him here, and an equal share of bad ones too.

His eyes snapped open and he shook his head, forcing the unwanted memories back as far as they'd go. He ran a hand through his hair and started walking towards the doorway. After paying and getting the stamp on the back of his hand that allowed him to buy alcohol, he went inside.

The place had been given a 'revamp', to put it bluntly. The inside had been completely modernised, where the old black iron used to be there was now chrome and steel. Behind the stage there was a stack of television screens picturing a spiral of colours behind the local band.

Xander threaded his way over to the bar and ordered a beer. He was almost half an hour late and was already making up an excuse as to why. Naturally he couldn't tell them the truth; he could just imagine their reactions to that. _'Hi guys, do you know where I can find Riley Finn so that I can kill him because some people want him dead.'_ He smirked as he envisioned how they'd react to that.

"Xander! Hey, Xander!"

He turned at the sound of the familiar voice, looking for the source and saw Willow waving at him from underneath the balcony. He made his way over to her, slipping back into his façade.

"Where've you been?" she asked as he joined her.

"Working." He replied, smiling. "Where is everyone?"

"Back here." Buffy called from a group of people sitting around the couches. He looked at each of them, Buffy, perched on one of the chairs with her back against a table, a man Xander knew he recognised slouched on one of the couches, green hair standing on end, and there was also a black man lying on another with his eyes closed. It almost looked as if he was sleeping.

"Hey guys," he said to them, still grinning. "How's it going?"

"Xander, you remember Oz don't you?" Willow pointed at the green-haired man.

"Hey," Oz said, tipping his beer in Xander's direction before looking out at the band onstage. Oz, something pinged in Xander's memory at that, oh yeah, werewolf. Great, just great, he thought sarcastically. Another annoying hound that could sniff him out.

"Come on," Willow said, sitting down next to Oz. She patted the empty seat beside her, "Sit."

Carefully, he sat down, while Oz laid his hand along the back of the couch.

"Who's that?" he asked Buffy.

"That's Forrest. He's… a friend." Willow answered, uncertainly.

Xander turned to Oz, "You… were in a band?"

"Still am." Came the short reply.

From what Xander remembered about Oz, apart from the fact that he was a werewolf, was that he spoke very little, and only when he had to.

"You should have seen him." Willow said with a grin. "He was incredible."

Oz smiled at her and moved the arm that was lying on the back of the couch, round her shoulders and took a sip of his beer.

"And you see him every night." Buffy chimed in.

"I know, but he's the best guitar player ever." Willow replied.

Xander too a sip of his beer as his eyes scanned the club, but so far, there was no sign of his mark.

"Hey, guys."

Xander's attention was drawn back to the group and saw that a young blond girl was hovering nearby.

"Hey Tara," Buffy greeted warmly. The girl smiled slightly before glancing around the group. Her gaze settled on Xander as Buffy invited her to sit down on the chair next to her.

Xander smiled and tipped his beer in her direction as they were introduced. She frowned at him slightly before smiling in return. The hairs on the back of his neck rose in warning. Something didn't seem right with this… Tara. He felt like she could see right through him or something.

He decided to kick back and watch them for a while, the reactions, the way they inter-acted with each other. He noticed that Tara seemed wary, and excused herself a few times. Oz and Willow had been dating last time he'd seen them, and now they seemed even closer, although he wasn't sure if they were actually together or not. They seemed to be just close friends.

By half ten, Xander knew he should start to get going. He had to be at the site early the next day and he still had homework to finish on Finn. Inwardly, he smirked at that, he'd hated high school while he was there, never did any of his homework or anything like that, and now, here he was, among former friends, thinking about checking up on someone he had to kill. Ironic didn't even begin to cover it.

His eyes strayed out to the crowd, over the people dancing, talking, drinking, and generally having a good time with their own friends. And here he was, drinking his beer and planning another way to kill a human being.

His gaze settled on a sandy-coloured head making its way through the crowd. Xander watched as Finn emerged and began making his way towards the group sitting on the couches.

And he wasn't the only one who saw Finn either.

Buffy tensed and spider cracks appeared in the glass of Cola she was holding. Willow winced at the sound of the glass starting to splinter and Tara followed the Slayer's gaze to where Finn was still heading towards them, "Uh-oh." She whispered.

Even Oz tensed as Finn leaned in and whispered something in Buffy's ear. She pushed him away none too gently, but he came straight back.

"Not now, Riley." She hissed at him.

"Buffy, this is really important." He said, grabbing her arm. She grabbed his in return and everyone winced when Finn's arm cracked under her strength.

"Not now, Riley." She repeated through gritted teeth.

"It's important." He hissed back. She sighed, and Xander struggled to suppress a smirk. If memory served him right, pissing Buffy off was never the best thing to do.

"This better be important." She growled and followed him off into the crowd. Xander watched their backs until they disappeared from sight. Something told him that Finn only brought bad news.

" 'Scuse me guys," Xander said, standing and moving to the edge of the group. "I'll be back in a minute."

Without looking back, he made his way towards the bar, and then veered off when he was sure he'd lost them in the crowd. He headed upstairs, where he could get a bird's eye view of the club.

Once at the top, he couldn't see the group, but he could clearly see Buffy and Finn arguing over near the bar. From here, he could probably manage to kill them and get away, but he was curious as to why they were fighting, so he waited.

Just less than six months of lip reading had taught him to wait for the right moment, and to glean information about others from his victims. But there was only one topic between these two.

Him

Definitely time to end this conversation. Finn had obviously done some homework on him.

Xander sighed and reached for the Colt strapped to his hip under his shirt. There were days, of course, when he didn't want to kill, but it was his life now, a part of him. And in order to protect himself, he had to do some things he'd rather not do given the choice. There wasn't one here.

Sighting carefully along the barrel, he saw Finn about to reveal what he did for a living. Out the corner of his eye, he noticed a fight had broke out near the bar and a large man was pushed into Buffy and Finn, effectively ending their conversation.

Suppressing a sigh, he placed the weapon back in its place, and decided instead, to wait as well, and see what the night would bring.

Tbc…

AN- Sorry, no dead Riley in this one, and since now my prelims are over, I hope to be finishing this up soon, but I do have proper exams in a couple of months so no promises and my muse keeps flitting off. Anyways, if you are reading, then please review.


	4. Chapter Four

AN- Huge apologies for the delay in writing, but school's really been kicking my ass recently and I have exams throughout May so I probably won't be able to fully update until the last week or so. This chapter was pretty much very quickly typed up, so please excuse any spelling mistakes or grammar and that. I hope whoever's reading is enjoying the story, and please leave a review.

Disclaimer- See chapter one.

**Soldier **

**Chapter Four**

Xander had to return to the group as quickly as he could. If the others suspected anything in the least, he'd be forced to reveal what had happened to him. Not something he was looking forward to. At all.

He slid down the stairs and threaded through the crowd, careful not to bump into anyone and possibly tick them off. Someone tapped him on the shoulder. His hand went to his gun as he turned around to face them.

"Hey," said the shy blond Willow had introduced him to earlier. What was her name? Zara? No, it was Tara, or so he hoped.

"Hey," he said, smiling down at her. She seemed like a nice person, a little shy and unsure of herself, but nice all the less.

"We were getting worried about where you had got to." She said to him, frowning slightly at him.

How long had he been upstairs? He wandered, it couldn't have been that long, could it?

"I was just--" He didn't get to finish his sentence as someone barreled into him from behind, forcing him against Tara. Her hands came up to steady them both and when she touched his chest, he felt bolts of magic rip through him.

_A voice shouted in the dark._

_Tires screeched in protest. _

_A bullet bit through flesh and bone. _

_Blood sprayed out of a woman's chest as she collapsed to the ground._

_Dead._

Xander shoved himself away from Tara and stumbled back, eyes wide in a mixture of fear, surprise and pain. He was too stunned to move. Memories of that night had turned him to stone. He could remember that time only too well. The car…the street…

His first kill.

Shit, he muttered inwardly, realizing she must have seen the same thing he did. He scanned the crowd in front of him for any sign of the blond girl, but couldn't see her anywhere. She must have slid off when he was dazed, he realized.

"Damn it!" he cursed. She was a witch. This night probably couldn't get any better, he thought, as he made his way over to where the others were.

"I've got time for a quick patrol before I head home." Buffy was saying as Xander rejoined the group. Her gaze rested on him, a slight frown flitting across her face. "What took you so long?" she asked, almost carelessly.

"There was a queue," he replied, gesturing over his shoulder. He reached for his drink and sat down next to Buffy when he noticed Willow talking quietly with Tara on the couch. "What's going on?" he asked, frowning.

"Nothing." Buffy said, reaching for her coat. "I just have to get home early. I have work in the morning." She looked at Willow. "Are you gonna be okay?"

Willow nodded with a smile. "I have Oz here to keep an eye on me. And there's Forrest, too," she frowned at the man in question. "If he ever wakes up."

"Am 'wake." Forrest mumbled, rolling over onto his side so that his back was to the group.

"Okay, I'm off." Buffy said, "I think I'll swing past Green Gates on my way home."

"Green Gates?" Xander asked, curious. "My apartment's not far from there. Mind if I join you?"

"Sure." Buffy replied, heading off.

"See you guys later." Xander said as he followed his old friend. Willow smiled at him before turning back to Tara. He lsot sight of them in the crowd.

"I thought you went to college," he said, once they were outside. He pulled his coat closer against the cold, automatically falling into step beside her as they headed down the back alleys.

"Gotta pay the bills somehow," she replied. He paused and watched as she walked on ahead. Hadn't her mother left her anything apart from the house? He really needed to get some answers out of her. Straight answers, preferably. In particular, answers that told him more about what had happened between her and Finn.

"So, how far is your place from the cemetery?" Buffy asked, jerking him out of his thoughts.

"About half a block," he replied, glancing over his shoulder. There was something weird going on tonight, he could feel it. It itched under his skin.

"Are you okay?" Buffy asked when he cricked his neck.

Shit, he'd forgotten he never used to do that. It only happened when he was really, really nervous, like right now. He lived no where near Green Gates cemetery, in fact, he now lived on the other side of town.

"Yeah, I'm fine," he answered as they crossed an intersection and headed into the cemetery.

Green Gates was one of the more recent cemeteries that had been built in Sunnydale. The land sloped slightly down to what Xander presumed was a river or stream of some kind. Idly, he wandered what was down there as Buffy lead him along the path.

"You live on the other side, right?" she asked as the path began to climb uphill. Xander turned round when he sensed a presence behind him, and froze when he saw the vampire sitting on a headstone to his right.

"Er… Buffy?" he croaked.

The vampire grinned at him, sensing his discomfort, and then looked up at the slayer. "Hello, kitty," the demon purred.

Xander wanted to glance over his shoulder at Buffy, but didn't want to take his eyes off of the vampire in front of him.

"What do you want?" Buffy's cold voice rang out.

"My little boy's having a party," the vampire pouted, staring at the ground. "You're going to miss it. Do you know who's going to be there?"

"Who?" Buffy asked, descending the path to look the demon in the eye.

"All your little friends," the vampire said, she leapt off of the headstone and began spinning round in a circle, arms out wide and singing to herself. "They'll be dancing around and around and around. The witches, the wolf and the killer will all be there, but the slayer will not." The vampire stopped spinning suddenly, and fixed her eyes on Buffy. She leaned forward and smiled coldly, whispering. "You're missing the party."

With a laugh, the demon leapt up onto a mausoleum and disappeared, leaving Buffy and Xander alone. Xander finally felt his muscles relax and slouched against the mausoleum wall. Buffy remained standing still, eyes closed.

"Buffy?" Xander asked, cautiously taking a step forward.

Buffy's eyes snapped open. "Willow. Oz…"

She took off running back along the path, Xander attempted to keep up but with her slayer speed, she easily outmatched him. He paused when he came to the gates. This was a part of town he didn't recognize. He glanced around, trying to remember which way they had come, when he heard a growl behind him. Slowly, he turned, hoping that it wasn't Drusilla again. She was one vampire he didn't think he'd ever be able to face without either freezing up or running.

It was a Kethlon demon. A largely harmless, dog like demon that preferred to spend its time hunting deep in forests than socializing with humans. It didn't seem to have seen Xander, and Xander moved into the darkness of the cemetery walls as it passed by. Strangely, it seemed to be speaking in Italian, and not its own native tongue.

Xander managed to recognize two words though. 'Il Bronzo'. Roughly translated, The Bronze.

He managed to follow the demon back to the Bronze without being detected and watched as a large, vampire stepped out of the front door and discussed something with the Kethlon for a moment. The Kethlon shrugged and headed back down the alley. Xander ducked as the demon passed his hiding place and frowned down at him.

The front door slammed, jerking him out of his thoughts. He looked up and saw a Buffy standing in front of the vampire. The vamp crossed his arms and smiled down at her, golden eyes gleaming with malicious anticipation.

Buffy didn't seem in the least concerned by the vampire's appearance. Instead, she merely demanded to be let in. When he slid into game face, she merely shrugged and slugged him right on the nose. He fell back from the force of the blow, blood trickling from his nose and grinned at her as she folded her arms over her chest.

Xander frowned as the vampire stood back and allowed her to enter the club. He looked up at the roof, searching for another way inside, and spotted a boarded over window near a third of the way up. Lowering his gaze, he searched for a way up.

Picking up an empty beer bottle that was lying near his feet on the alley floor, he threw it as hard as he could down a neighboring alley and watched as the vampire turned to look that way. Taking his chance, Xander ran across the fire escape and began to climb up. He managed to reach the window and jumped across. Taking a pen-knife from his pocket, he pried the board open and slipped through, carefully slipping the board back into place when he was done.

He turned and scanned the club from the balcony. If the vampire outside was any clue, then there was definitely a party going on in here tonight. Carefully, he made his way downstairs and stopped as close to his old friends as he could without alerting them to his presence.

Buffy had been talking to them when she turned and scanned the club, eyes flitting back and forth looking for something.

Or someone.

Xander pushed as far back into the shadows as he could.

"What is it?" Forrest asked quietly. Xander glanced over at the black man. Forrest had one hand in his pocket and looked about ready to pull out a weapon of some kind.

Buffy's gaze rested on the stage. "We have a very big problem."

Xander turned towards the stage, as did the others, and saw that the band was either slumped on the floor or against the drum kit. Blood leaked from bite marks on their necks and the lead singer struggled uselessly against a hooded figure on stage. The crowd had fallen silent, and watched as the figure grabbed the man's head with one hand and squeezed. The sound of the singer's skull cracking open resounded around the club.

From all over the club, Xander could hear the sound of people vomiting and he started to breath through his mouth when the smell of blood and vomit reached his nose. He could still taste it on the air, but the taste didn't really matter, that he could ignore.

Glancing around, Xander realized that the crowd had fallen back, staying as far away from the stage as they could. Some tried to run for the exit, but the large vampire sent most of them scurrying back with a few well placed punches. As the vampire turned, Xander caught a glimpse of a scar along the back of the demon's head.

"Spike." Buffy muttered under her breath.

Xander's eyebrows rose. Spike as in the Spike? The one who had kidnapped Willow and him? The one who had tried to kill Buffy just because he wanted to win an award for the most slayers killed? Slowly, Xander turned to face the stage as the vampire threw back his hood and grinned at them.

Tbc…


	5. Chapter Five

AN- Since my friends aren't being very co-operative over Snow Secrets, I have started working on this one a little bit. So far, I've got the rest of this story planned out and I hope to have it finished before I leave for my Nan's during the summer. As always, reviews are welcome, as are flames, constructive criticism etc…

Disclaimer- Go see chapter one.

**Soldier**

**Chapter Five**

"Holy shit!" Xander couldn't stop the curse from escaping his lips as he stared at the demon onstage. He heard several people gasp and scream at the sight before them and somewhere behind him he heard a thud as someone hit the ground.

Half of his face had been peeled away and what looked like scales had been grafted back on. His hair had been completely shaven off revealing criss-crossing scars all over his scalp. He still wore his trademark black assemble of clothes, including his leather duster – only his left arm seemed to be a bit bulkier than his other side – and when he brought his hand up, Xander could see why. Spiky bones poked through the leather and instead of a hand, the vampire had dark green talons instead. The scar was still cutting through his eyebrow and only one of his eyes was blue, the other was pure gold. All in all, Xander thought that maybe the vampire had been put into a blender with a lizard.

Spike still managed to smile though as he scanned the club. He took a deep breath, probably scenting the fear on the air. It was so thick that even Xander could feel it. But when Spike's gaze landed on Xander, the human had to suppress a shiver at the coldness in the… vampire's eyes, while Spike merely smirked.

"So," Spike growled at last, "The whelp's back. Been hearing a lot of tales about you, boy," his gold eye glittered, "Some very interesting tales…"

"Don't believe everything you hear," Xander retorted, wincing inside at the weakness of the comeback. He kept his gaze levelled with the demons, even though he desperately wanted to look away and search for the others. There was something seriously wrong here. Had this been what they were keeping from him? Was this their secret?

"Oh who said I heard it?" Spike replied with a grin. His tongue clicked against his lower teeth. "Who said I didn't _see_ it?"

Xander felt several sets of curious eyes turn on him and inwardly cursed. Had the… vampire… really seen him kill that boy? Or was he bluffing? Either way, Xander couldn't tell, he'd never really been one to clean up after he killed collateral so anyone could have found out about it by now.

"Xander, what's he talking about?"

The voice came from beside him and he glanced down to find Buffy standing next to him. She must have slipped through the crowd while he'd been talking to Spike. Did she really believe that… thing? He wandered.

"No clue," he lied to her, turning back to Spike.

He felt her look at him, probably trying to figure out what was really going on in his mind. He kept his face as blank as he could, although he couldn't stop himself from gritting his teeth as his gaze roamed around the club, looking for Spike's lackeys. So far though, the only ones he could actually see were the two standing in front of the stage on the floor glaring at the crowd and the big one that blocked the door.

Buffy turned to face Spike and called out, "What is it this time?"

"Oh, nothing," Spike replied, but his smiled disappeared. "Just wanted to let you know that I'm back," Spike turned away from her then, and his gaze settled on someone in the crowd. He looked down at the vampires in front of him. "Kill him," he growled.

Without a word, the vampires moved forward. Behind Xander, people started screaming and moving as far back into the club as they could, but there was little room to move. He turned and saw several more vampires shoving people aside as they searched for whoever Spike had ordered dead, obviously they had fled into the crowd in the hope of escaping.

"Willow, Tara, see if you can do that spell," Buffy shouted over her shoulder. "Oz, watch out for them. Forrest, get everyone out of here and Xander," he turned to look at her with a frown. She stared at him for a minute, probably wandering if he was trustworthy, before she said, "Help Forrest. Spike's mine."

Xander didn't say anything to that, only nodded and pushed his way over to the door. He glanced over his shoulder to see Buffy fighting her way to the stage, and to his right, Oz had transformed into the werewolf and was taking the head off of any vampire that tried to get close to the two witches. Forrest was already at the door, trying to get the large vampire out of the way.

For a second, Xander wandered why Buffy hadn't killed the vampire before but didn't have much time to dwell on it as someone barrelled into him.

He heard the snarl and saw the yellow eyes and instinct prompted him to react. Reaching down into his pocket with one hand, Xander grabbed the small vampire by the scruff of his neck with the other and staked it through the heart. As the demon crumbled to dust, he noticed that Willow and Tara seemed to be struggling with the spell.

It reminded him of all the demons outside. What were they doing? Waiting to get in?

He shook his head, no; they were waiting for the humans to go out to them. That had to be it.

He turned from the witches and glanced at the door. Forrest had managed to push the large vampire back and was holding an axe to the demons throat. He seemed to be struggling with killing it and Xander noticed another vamp trying to sneak up on them from behind. This second vampire held a broken wooden beam in one hand.

"Forrest!" Xander shouted in warning as he made his way over to the other man.

Forrest turned in time to see the beam coming at him and ducked. The beam smashed into the large vampire's stomach, showering blood and skin all over the floor. Forrest lashed out with his free hand and caught the second vamp off guard. The demon tumbled to the floor as the large one bellowed in pain.

Xander had reached them then, and crouched down to stake the fallen vamp. Forrest beat him to it. Pulling the axe away from the large vampire's throat, the black man brought it crashing down on the fallen one's neck.

"Thanks," Forrest said, turning back to the large vampire.

"You're welcome," Xander replied.

The demon stood, holding his stomach with to stop too much blood from escaping, and glared up at both men with yellow eyes. Forrest shrugged and lifted his axe. The vampire moved faster than Xander could have imagined, and naturally, it went straight for him.

He felt the vampire's hands slip around his neck, squeezing off his air supply as it lifted him off the ground from behind. Spluttering for air, Xander tried to kick at it as the vampire stared over his shoulder at Forrest. The other man had started to circle round them, looking for an opening, but the vamp followed his movements and made sure that there wasn't one. Xander could feel the demons fangs graze his neck and tried again to get out of the vamp's grip.

Forrest lunged forward, and the vampire squeezed harder. Forrest jumped back and Xander glared at him as his vision started to blur. Closing his hands into fists, Xander slammed his elbows back into the vamp and at the same time Forrest leapt forward again.

Xander gulped in air gratefully as the demon disintegrated behind him.

"Thanks," he said, as soon as he was sure he could breathe properly.

"You're welcome," Forrest replied.

A scream from behind them caught their attention, and Xander turned to see a woman being dragged towards the stage. And that woman had red hair.

"Willow?" Xander wandered aloud.

"How many people do you know with red hair?" Forrest replied dryly. He turned, keeping his back to the door. "See if you can open that," he said, his eyes fixed on the woman.

"'Kay," Xander said, knowing it would be hopeless to complain, even if that was his old best friend being pulled into harm's way. Whatever the vampire had done to the lock on the door, he'd done it with the skill of an amateur. It was the work of a moment for Xander to unlock the door. He turned back to Forrest, questions whirling in his mind. "Done."

"Good," Forrest said, turning to look at him, "Now help everyone out."

Xander frowned at him. Outside? Where the demons were waiting?

"Hold on a sec," he said to the other man, and pulled open the door a little.

Sure enough, there were demons of all kinds waiting in the alleyway outside. There were big demons, little demons, ones that resembled cute little kittens with huge fangs jutting out their mouths and ones that resembled vicious hunting dogs among many more. They seemed to be waiting for something. Xander turned and frowned at the crowd. Or they were waiting for their dinner?

"Outside's not safe," Xander muttered, closing the door quietly.

Forrest's head whipped round. "What?"

"There are demons waiting out there," Xander told him. He sighed and leaned against the door as Forrest turned back to the stage. Spike was talking to Willow, telling her something, but it was hard to hear what above the cries coming from the crowd.

"There are demons in here as well," Forrest muttered under his breath.

Xander frowned at Spike, "He put an anti-magic spell up."

"What?" Once more Forrest's head whipped round to glare at Xander. "How do you know?"

"I can lip-read," Xander answered. Once Spike had finished speaking, he turned to grin at Buffy, apparently pleased with himself. Xander turned to frown at the door and an idea struck him. "Forrest, wait here a second," he told the other man.

"What?" Forrest asked, as Xander slipped outside. "What are you--"

Xander closed the door on the other man's face.

That seemed to get the demons' attention. All of them turned to look at him with various expressions. Some seemed disappointed, others curious, but most were staring at him hungrily.

"Here goes," Xander muttered as he took a step forward. Behind him, he heard a tapping noise and turned to see a spider demon climbing down the wall of the club. The demon was watching him with an intentness that made him shiver.

The Kethlon demon that he had followed to the club before was sitting on top of a dumpster to Xander's right. Xander glanced at it before he realised that all the demons were waiting for something.

"You're not afraid," a large cat-like demon commented. Above Xander, the spider laughed, or at least, Xander hoped that it was a laugh. "Why?"

"Leave," Xander said, hoping that they would leave without a fight.

"Why?" the Kethlon asked. "We were promised a feast."

"You're going to have to feast somewhere else," Xander told it. That strange feeling was back. The feeling that something was wrong. Slowly, Xander reached for his guns.

"He has those weapons!" the spider demon shouted.

Growling, some of the demons ran forward, and Xander started shooting before they could get within five feet. The spider pounced on him from above, and Xander barely managed to dodge it. He shot it four times in the back but it still didn't go down.

Cursing when he realised he was out of bullets, Xander pushed the guns back into place and held out his hands. He only prayed that this would work. He hadn't used this spell in quite a while, and he noticed the demons starting to either back away or leave. They seemed to recognise it. He only hoped that would be enough.

His arm was starting to hurt. He grabbed his wrist with his other hand to steady his arm and winced in pain.

_"This spell takes a lot of energy out of whoever uses it and if it is used incorrectly, then you can even be killed by it."_

The words echoed in Xander's mind, uncomfortably reminding him of the dangers of this spell. He could already feel the pull of it on his muscles.

"We can still take him!" someone shouted.

Xander looked up and saw several demons racing towards him. He turned his hand so that his palm faced the demons and forced himself to concentrate on the spell. Naturally, he only used this spell in defence, and this time he desperately needed its protection. The spider demon was at the front and Xander closed his eyes as it leapt at him. He could only pray that this would work.

He felt the magic surround him, washing over him as the God leant him his power, and then the power was gone, thrown outwards in a whirl of dangerous magic, destroying everything in its path.

The demons didn't stand a chance against it.

Exhausted, Xander staggered backwards, unable to keep his balance, and fell to the ground. He looked up through blurry eyes and saw the pieces of demon that littered the floor in front of the club. Idly, he wandered what kind of excuse the authorities would make up. The magic had scorched the walls of the surrounding buildings as well, they'd most likely dismiss it as a gas leak or something.

Far away, he heard people screaming and nearby, the door swung open and banged the wall near his head. He winced as the sound echoed around his skull and watched as people ran in all directions, all eager to be as far away from the club as possible.

Xander frowned when a pair of legs stopped in front of him and struggled to remember whether he'd seen them before. The khakis were stained red in places, and obviously well worn, and the boots were heavy but well polished. He decided that he didn't know them at all and they were the last thing he saw before everything went black.

Tbc…


	6. Chapter Six

AN- Please do not kill me for the long wait in updates. My mother decided to cart me off to my cousins and other places during the holidays so I've not had much chance to write. Be warned though, this chapter was written at midnight while I was watching Final Destination so some parts might not make much sense so please review so I know what you think.

Disclaimer: Xander not mine, Willow not mine, no one mine (except Forrest) and the children's rhyme is something that I remembered from when I was in primary school so technically speaking it's not mine. I just put it in because it seemed to fit with the story. Am gonna shut up now so you can get on with reading.

**Soldier**

**Chapter Six**

Xander was vaguely aware that his feet were dragging along the ground as someone carried him. There was an arm around his waist, and someone had pulled his arm around their shoulder. He tried to lift his head to see who was carrying him, but he couldn't, his head was too heavy. He couldn't even lift his feet to try and walk so he could keep up with their pace.

He could hear voices as well, but it sounded as though they were coming from far away. He couldn't even try and make out what they were saying. His whole body was trying to sleep, and right then, he really didn't want to fight it.

His face stung suddenly, and a cold hand lifted his face up. His eyelids drooped, he couldn't keep them open, but a finger forced his left eyelid up, forcing him to look. He saw pale yellow light, blond hair ahead of him, and red hair beside him. And right in front of him was a dark face. The lips were moving, and his training kicked in.

_"What the fuck?"_ they said and then the hand was gone and his head dropped again. Unable to move, he let them carry him along. He didn't know why, but he felt safe knowing that they were there. That was his last thought before he let the darkness take over again.

**X**

_"Wakey, wakey sleepyhead,  
Don't forget to make your bed,  
Breakfast's on the table,  
And it's going COLD!"_

Xander woke with a start, the children's rhyme echoing round his head like someone had just yelled it down his ear hole, and tried to sit up. He immediately regretted moving as pain shot through his entire body, forcing him to fall back onto whatever it was he was lying on.

The words echoed round and round his head, threatening to drive him insane and he found he recognised the voice. It was male, and had a distinct accent that he couldn't place, but he was sure he knew that voice.

Warmth spread through his shoulder, and he managed to look down and see that there was a hand resting against his skin.

"Xander? You alright?"

He knew that voice too. It had driven the other voice out of his mind, the rhyme now nothing but a distant thought at the back of his head.

"Xander!" this time the voice was more urgent, and a cold glass was placed against his lips. He had no choice but to drink down whatever it was that was in it.

"There," the voice said once he was finished. He could hear more clearly now, and most of his headache was gone. "That better?"

He managed to nod and his eyes focused on the figure sitting next to him. They had red hair and a kind face. They smiled at him.

"What… happened?" he asked. God, he needed something to wet his throat. Whatever she'd given him before had helped but his throat still felt like it was on fire.

"Don't you remember?" she asked, a slight frown creased her brow.

The last thing he could remember was watching a figure… dressed in white as they spun round and round in a circle… their head looking up at the night sky. After that was pretty much a blur.

"No," he choked out. "Don't remember… nothing… Need water."

He heard footsteps, and then the glass was against his lips again. He almost moaned as the water slid down his throat and this time, when he opened his eyes, things were a lot clearer, although there was a slight pounding in his head. When he looked round, he saw that he was in a room, but he didn't recognise it at all. He was lying on a double bed opposite a large window, a door was on his right and a chest of doors stood on the other side of the bed.

Willow sat in a chair next to the bed, the glass still in her hands. A dark-skinned man leaned against the wall behind her, glaring at Xander. Xander frowned back, trying to recall the man's name but came up empty. He was sure they'd been introduced though, and it wasn't like his memory to let him down. Willow turned to look at him.

"Hey, Forrest, why don't you go and see if Buffy can take a look at that scratch?" she said softly.

Forrest didn't seem to like the idea, confusion flashed across his face and he sent another glare Xander's way before he nodded and left the room. Xander noticed a gash running from his left shoulder blade down to his waist and looked up at the wall where he had been standing. There was a large red mark on the pale yellow paint.

He remembered the club then, and the demons in the alley outside. Xander closed his eyes as his memory clouded, but he distinctly remembered seeing a vampire with a golden eye and a blue. He had known the vampire. Spike! That was it! It had been Spike in the club, and he'd fought against the vampires. Xander couldn't remember why he'd been there in the first place but he remembered the fight, and then Forrest had told him not to go outside but he did.

"Spike…" he said, and glanced at Willow. She nodded.

"You remember Spike?" she asked.

"Yeah, at the Bronze, he was there," an image of the vampire's contorted face and arm flashed through his mind and he winced at the picture.

"He er… got away," Willow said softly. "But we managed to get everyone out safely. The cops arrived afterwards. They're using the usual story to cover it all up."

"Gang on PCP?"

"Yeah," she smiled, and then frowned at him. "Xander?"

"Yeah?"

"Forrest told us that there were demons outside… and you… you went outside and locked the door."

Xander struggled to remember, but all he could recall was talking to the spider demon and a dog demon.

He shrugged at her. "I don't remember what happened."

Well, that was as truthful as he could get it. His body ached in a way that was only this painful after he had used magic, or more specifically, the chaos winds. That must have been what happened. He had got rid of the demons using the winds, and then passed out from the power it had taken out of him. That could be the only explanation. The winds didn't just destroy pretty much everything within twenty feet. They also completely fucked with your mind if you saw – or used – them. That would be why he couldn't remember much about what had happened.

"Hey, Will," he said, looked across at her. She frowned at him. "You said the cops were covering it up?"

She nodded, a confused look on her face, "Yeah."

"The press there yet?" he asked.

"They got there the same time as the cops," she answered, still confused.

He gestured weakly to the TV sitting on top of the chest of drawers. "Mind if I watch, it might help with…" he raised a hand and tapped his head. His arm felt like lead, and he was sure he probably wouldn't be able to use it for a while.

"Sure," she said, standing. It took her a moment to move around the bed and find the plug to turn the TV on. He had only noticed it a few minutes before and from the looks of it, it was a pretty old set. After a few minutes of fiddling around, Willow finally found the right channel and settled back down in the chair next to the bed.

**X**

"Hey, Will?" Xander asked, frowning at the redhead sitting next to the bed. The news had finished a little while before. Something was annoying him about Spike. He decided to just come out and ask it. "How did Spike… you know… get to be like that?"

She glanced from him to the portable TV and shifted her feet underneath her. "It's kinda a long story…"

"Well I'm not going anywhere soon," he grinned goofily at her. She managed a half smile back and he asked, "How did it happen?"

"Well… er… there was a…" she took a deep breath to steady herself. "There was an… organisation that captured demons and… er… experimented on them…"

"And Spike got caught?" Xander wandered what had happened to the town's sanity as Willow nodded and continued.

"Yeah, Spike was caught, but he managed to escape… He came to us… Buffy agreed to help him since he couldn't you know, bite anyone…" She held up a hand to stop him from interrupting again. "We found out where their base was and between us all, we managed to destroy it… but there was this- I don't know… failsafe I guess. It made all of the demons that they had captured go crazy…" He watched as her hand snaked up to her neck as she whispered, "Spike nearly killed us all. Angel had to come and take him away. And Riley… He…" she glanced over at the door again.

Xander followed her gaze. "What about Riley?" he asked as he looked back at her.

"He knew about it all…" Willow's voice had dropped even more and Xander had trouble hearing what she was saying. "He was a part of it all along. He and Buffy had been together since the demons had started to disappear. We found out after he left that Buffy was…"

She trailed off then, and looked over at the door, like she thought that someone was going to walk in any minute.

"He left?" Xander asked her. She glanced up at him with a frown, like she was trying to figure out what he was talking about.

She nodded again. "Once it was over, the Initiative gave him another assignment in South America. He accepted… and it broke Buffy's heart to see him go. I don't know all the details but I think they had some kind of big fight… Anyway, he left and came back about a month ago. Buffy pretty much doesn't want him around, but he wants to pick up where they left off."

The front door opened downstairs. Both of them turned as the sound of Buffy's voice echoed through the house. Willow stood and placed a hand on his shoulder. "You should probably get some more rest. You're still healing after all."

She attempted to smile, but there was a sadness in her eyes. He watched as she left the room, and she closed the door softly behind her.

Xander lay back and thought about what she had told him as voices drifted up the stairs. There was still something that wasn't right, though; there was something that didn't make sense. He was sure that Willow had told him the truth, but he couldn't stop his mind from wandering whether he'd told her all of it. There was still something niggling at the back of his mind as he fell into a dreamless sleep.

**X**

Loud voices startled Xander back to reality. Quickly, he brought a hand up to his eyes to rub away the sleep that had formed.

"What the hell do you mean, dangerous?"

Shit, Buffy sounded extremely pissed off. He pitied whoever she was arguing with and tried to get back to sleep. He had managed to sleep through quite a few arguments over the years, so this one shouldn't be any--

"What I _mean_ is that you don't know this man at all!"

Xander sat up at that, curious as to what exactly was going on and who exactly Buffy was arguing with. He didn't recognise the voice, so he assumed that it was the guy that had been at the club. God, what was his name?

The voices dropped then, and Xander struggled to hear what was going on. Cautiously, he slipped out of the bed, a little unsteady on his feet, which still felt like lead, and managed to pull himself towards the door. He pressed his ear against the wood as he heard the rest of the conversation.

"Xander is my friend," Buffy hissed through clenched teeth. "And I trust him."

"Oh, you do, do you?" the other voice replied, his voice dropping almost as low as hers. "Then tell me, did your friend know magic the last time you knew him?"

Silence. Then, quietly, Buffy spoke, "No."

"There you go. So how do you know that this is the same man that you used to know?"

"How do you know that what you saw was magic?"

"Don't tell me that you're really buying that gas leak shit the cops tell the press? Jesus, Buffy, I know you're blonde an' all but are you really--"

_Smack! Thud!_

Xander jumped back as something slammed against the door. There was a scratching sound from the other side before Buffy's cold voice rang out.

"Don't even think about it!"

The scratching stopped and footsteps padded off down the hall. Wisely, Xander tip-toed back to the bed, climbed in and rolled over so his back was to the wall.

The door opened a moment later. He stayed perfectly still, and kept his breathing as even as he could. The door clicked shut softly. He wanted to move, but wasn't sure whether anyone was still in the room or not. His heart pounding in his ears, he forced his body to relax so he could get at least a little sleep. He still needed time for his body to get over the strain of having to channel the winds. Moving before had completely tired him out, and he wasn't sure how long he could stay in this house before his deadline was up.

Downstairs, the TV went off and the front door opened. He heard Willow and the others calling their goodnights to each other. The front door closed and he heard voices ascending the stairs.

Voices belonging to Willow and Buffy.

They parted in the hallway. Buffy headed towards her old room while Willow headed into the room adjoining the one that Xander was currently in.

Xander let out a sigh of relief. He wasn't sure what exactly had happened between Buffy and Riley, but he knew exactly what had happened between Buffy and what's-his-face. The earlier 'conversation' had burned itself into his memory.

He tried to roll over and sleep but the words kept repeating themselves over and over in his mind. It hurt that what-the-fuck-was-he-called had asked Buffy whether he was still the same guy. The only problem was that it was the truth. He wasn't the same guy he had been when he had left. Not by a long fucking shot.

He closed his eyes and tried to force the thoughts out of his head. They point blank refused to leave.

He spent an hour trying to get to sleep but at sometime after four, he gave up. His limbs didn't feel as heavy as they had before and somehow, he managed to sit up and sling his legs over the side of the bed. Instantly, feeling returned – well, pins and needles – as the blood rushed round his limbs and once that passed, he managed a tired smile. This was probably going to be a little harder than he thought it would be, but at least now he could feel his extremities.

Carefully, he made his way out into the corridor, he could hear both Willow and Buffy breathing gently in their rooms and the earlier argument that Buffy had had with _I-give-up-trying-to-remember-his-name_ once again voiced it's opinion. Shaking his head, Xander made his way downstairs – mindful of the creaking third step – and out the front door.

TBC… 


	7. Chapter Seven

Disclaimer- no, do not own, just like to play with.

**Soldier**

**Chapter Seven**

The trip back to his temporary home took shorter than he thought it would, but then again, by the time Xander realised he was standing in front of his door just staring at it, he was mostly asleep. Just as he was reaching for his keys, the door swung open.

"Where the bloody hell have you been?"

"Working," Xander replied, yawning widely, and fell face first into the figure, who managed to grab him and somehow dragged him inside.

"Bloody hell, mate, you need to lay off them cheeseburgers," the figure grunted as he shoved Xander away and shut the door. A second later, the overhead light flicked on, revealing Xander's small motel room.

Already suffering from a headache, and in an effort to get some sleep, Xander slid down the wall, his eyes already falling shut as he muttered under his breath. "Ethan, please do me one favour and shut the hell up."

He heard Ethan sigh in annoyance and found himself jolting upright as a current of energy shot through him.

"Jesus, what was that for?" Xander growled, rubbing his chest with one hand. There were burn marks on his clothes and he grimaced down at his now blackened hand.

"For sleeping on the job," Ethan replied.

Xander glared at him, now fully awake thanks to that little spell. Ethan simply folded his arms over his chest and stared back. "Alright, already," Xander finally muttered, knowing that he probably wasn't going to win in any staring contest. "What are you doing here?"

"Technically, I'm not even here so that's one hell of a stupid question," Ethan replied, turning away to look around the room. What he was looking for, Xander could only guess at, and some of the answers his mind found were not pleasant ones.

A frown crossed Xander's face, "Hold on a sec', if you're not here, then how come I can see you?"

The other man rolled his eyes. "Most people would call it 'astral projection'. Others would probably say that you're hallucinating. And personally I'd go with the latter."

"So you're not here?" This was getting confusing, and considering the lack of sleep that was really starting to affect him, it would probably only get more so later.

"No, I'm not," Ethan frowned at a stain on the bed.

Xander rolled his eyes and attempted to stand, only to fall back down again. Ethan watched, mild amusement on his face, as the American slowly dragged himself over to the bed and hoisted his body up onto it.

Xander fell back on the bed, panting, once he was done, and silently cursed as he attempted to sit up again. Evidently, the spell that Ethan had cast was only a temporary boost of energy, emphasis on the 'temporary'. He felt his eyes shutting as all the energy left his body, leaving it limp and heavy.

"Hey, mister, we got no time to sleep right now!" Ethan's voice invaded his sleepy mind. "OI! Come on, wake up!

Xander muttered something about Ethan going away, or shutting up, he wasn't sure which because slowly Ethan's voice was fading away, and then something wet hit him across the face.

"For fuck's sake, Ethan!" he shot up, pulling the wet towel off of his face, and glared at the other man through tired eyes. Damn it, he really did not want to have to put up with Ethan's shit right then. "Ethan," he growled, waving the wet towel while Ethan looked on, amused, as Xander continued, "I have not slept properly all night."

"Shouldn't've used the winds, then," Ethan muttered under his breath. Naturally, he said it loud enough for Xander to hear, but for once, Xander ignored the comment.

"So please, at least give me an hour before you tell me whatever it is that you had to 'project' yourself out here to tell me." With that, Xander fell back on the bed, the towel already falling from his grasp as he heard Ethan mutter.

"Alright, already, no need to bloody shout. But one hour is all you're getting, mister."

And sure enough, precisely one hour later, Ethan woke Xander up by once again slapping the wet – and dirty – towel across the American's face.

**X**

_The first thing that hit him was that his feet were cold. In fact, they weren't cold; they were freezing, and perilously close to being numb. His arms were wrenched around his back, almost dislocating his shoulders, hands tied to each other in what felt – and probably looked – like a Celtic knot. _

_"Ah, I see you're awake." _

_His head snapped up at the voice. He knew it, recognised it from… somewhere, but couldn't place where. He tried to look around, but something at his neck tugged him back down._

_"Easy boy, I'm not gonna hurt you. Physically, at least."_

_He barely resisted the urge to roll his eyes and tried tugging at his arms to get them loose. It didn't work._

_"You do not want to do that."_

_"Why not?" he bit back._

_"Because if you do that, then I drop this."_

_He heard electric crackling and the thing that dragged him down loosened so that he could look up. A black man stood three feet away, one hand raised, and bolts of lightning flicking between his fingers. He had a neutral look on his face, almost as if he was bored with what he was doing. _

_Xander frowned at him. The man shook his head and muttered under his breath, "I told you not to look up."_

_Xander tugged on his arms again as the man started to move. His arm came up like he was throwing a ball, but before the bolts could strike, something wet and heavy slapped Xander's face, effectively waking him up._

Xander cursed, swore, groaned and glared at Ethan when he woke. The Brit didn't seem in the least concerned. Instead, he folded his arms over his chest and paced from one side of the room to the other. He paused at the window.

"Forrest, right?" he asked as Xander threw the towel on the floor.

"What?"

"The guy you dream about." Ethan replied, turning to face the American.

Xander slipped off his shirt and sorted through his bag for a clean one. "He's one of Buffy's friends, I think."

"He's also a powerful warlock," Ethan said, turning to face Xander. "Wanted for any crime you could come up with in the late sixties, captured by the Council in the seventies, escaped after only a couple of days – you can guess what they wanted to do. After that, he went to ground, not been heard from since, then a few years back, he shows up in Sunnydale and sides with the slayer."

"How did he escape?" Xander asked, glancing over his shoulder. He knew how difficult it was to get out of Council headquarters as it was, even though back then they didn't even have security cameras, they at least had the magical advantage.

"Magic. It's one of his specialities." Ethan replied.

Oh goodie, Xander thought, "His favourite being?"

"Guess."

"Oh shit, not mind games." Sometimes, realisation was not a good thing. Xander ran a hand over his face, rubbing away the slight traces of sleep that had formed. That could mean that any time he was near Forrest, the other man could easily get into his mind and his thoughts. He was really going to have to be careful around that one.

"Bullseye."

"That's how he got out, isn't it." It was not a question, just an observation that Ethan was about to confirm.

"Oh yeah."

"Want me to take him out?"

Ethan shook his head. "No, orders are to just kill Finn, leave Forrest alone for now. The Council don't know where he is so we'll leave him for another time, if they ever find out about him."

"So why tell me about him?"

"Just giving you a heads up."

"Appreciate it. Now get out. I need to take a shower."

"Did not want to hear that." Ethan grimaced and started to fade before he reappeared again. "Oh, and they want me to remind you. You only got until tomorrow before they send the cleanup in."

"Thanks." Xander headed into the shower, a clean shirt over his shoulder.

**X**

He got out of the shower twenty minutes later to find his computer switched on and early morning light attempting to penetrate through the blinds over the window. Frowning at the clock, he slipped his shirt on and sat down in front of his computer.

The light overhead flickered off and on, off and on, over and over again, until he stood and flicked it off. There was adequate light coming in through the window by then.

Ethan had emailed him, sending him more detailed information on Forrest and Finn. He glanced over Forrest's file, and then turned to Finn's. There was nothing new there either, but there was a note at the bottom of the file. It looked handwritten, barely legible, and Xander tilted his head to one side to read it.

_'Answer the door'_

"What the…" he wandered aloud.

Timid knocking on his door made him start and look up. It came again, three short raps, and he shook his head, wandering who in the hell would be knocking on his door at seven a.m. Hopefully, it wasn't room service.

It was Willow.

The door was open before he could wander how the hell she had managed to find him and she smiled up at him softly. The thought then occurred to him that he hadn't told anyone where he was staying – he'd lied to Buffy about it, yes – but he hadn't told anyone his real address. So how had she found out that he was here?

"Hey," she said, her smile disappearing when he frowned at her. "Can I come in?"

"Er…" he tried to find a good reason not to let her in, but couldn't come up with one. "Sure," he stood aside and she brushed past.

Silently, he closed the door and asked the question that was nagging him. "How did you find me?"

She turned and grinned, holding up her hands. "Magic."

He gave her a look and the grin faded. "Seriously," he said, moving past her to where his computer was and turning it off. There was no need for her to see what he had been doing.

"Okay, okay," she dropped onto the bed. "I hacked into the motel database and searched for someone who was male, on their own and used to live locally. It came up with you. Here. And then me and Tara did a spell to confirm that it really was you here and it turns out that it _was_ you. Here."

He smirked, same old Willow, always babbling when she got nervous. But inwardly, he frowned, they shouldn't have been able to find him if the spells that he'd put up to cover his tracks still worked. Of course, there was always a chance that they didn't since his little magical outburst the previous night.

"So… er… are you better?"

He frowned at her for a moment before he realised what she meant and smiled. "Yeah, I'm fine, just tired, is all."

"Are you sure that you're fine?" she asked. "You gave everyone quite a scare when you just disappeared."

"I'm sorry, just didn't want to be a burden," he told her quietly. He needed to steer this conversation well away from the direction that it was heading, otherwise he'd need to track down Riley, kill him and then skip town before the day was out.

"Xander, you're not a burden, you're our friend."

He closed his eyes at the sincerity of her words. No one had called him "friend" in years, not since he'd left Sunnydale and gone on to "richer pastures".

"Is Forrest right?"

"What?" he looked at her, confusion written over his face. What the hell did she mean by—

"He told us that you went out into an alleyway of demons… and that you had a gun."

Oh, that. "He doesn't like me, does he?" Sure, deflect with a question, like that's gonna work.

She looked away, uneasy. "He thinks you're not really you know… human. I think he told Buffy that you were a demon. She er… she didn't believe him."

"Well, what proof do you need? A truth spell," he asked, smiling at her. She looked up at him then, tears in the corners of her eyes threatening to fall.

"No," she said, brushing at the tears with one hand as she stood up. "I'd better get going, I have class."

He wanted to stop her and apologize, but the look in her eyes had stopped his blood cold. She didn't trust him, didn't know him. He was no longer the best friend that she had grown up with, and they both knew it. She was at the door before he could snap himself out of it.

"There's a er… meeting at Buffy's tonight… at eight," she said over her shoulder. She didn't look back at him as she closed the door behind her and he heard her footsteps moving steadily away.

Broken out of his reverie, Xander cursed and fell onto the bed.

"Thank God, I thought she'd never leave."

Xander groaned and silently prayed that he was dreaming.

"Do I have to slap you with another wet towel?"

No, he wasn't dreaming. He sat up and glared across the room at Ethan. "What do you want?"

"You have a mark to kill by tomorrow, you have no clue where he is and you're asking me what I want? Oh, that's rich." Ethan frowned around again as Xander rolled over onto his side, facing away from the annoying Brit.

"Go away," he muttered half-heartedly. God he was starting to get soft. Letting Willow inside had been a big mistake, he knew it, and somehow it was going to come back round and bite his ass off. Now he was in seriously deep shit. If Buffy or any of the others suspected what he was in town to do, he'd be dead faster than a--

"Look out the window."

"What?" he glanced over his shoulder at Ethan.

"Look. Out. The. Window. Do I really have to spell it out for you?"

"You just did," he said, lying back down again. Damn it, he was really too tired to be dealing with Ethan. What he really needed was a good long sleep, preferably on a jet plane at thirty thousand feet but he wasn't going to get that for another fifteen hours at least.

"So take a bloody look."

"Or you'll what?"

The towel landed on his face. With a sigh, he pulled it off, stood up and looked out the window.

On the corner opposite the motel, Willow and Forrest were standing and talking to one another. He wasn't sure, but he thought that he saw a third person with them, but that could easily be his imagination. He frowned at Ethan, who simply shrugged.

"They've been talking for a while," Ethan told him. "He's the one who brought her here."

"How do you know that?" Xander didn't take his eyes off the two as he spoke.

"I watched them from the roof."

"I need to get back to work," Xander said, closing the blinds and going over to the computer. As soon as he was comfortable, he rebooted it and started to work.

Tbc…


	8. Chapter Eight

Disclaimer: Nope, not mine, only Forrest belongs to me.

AN- Huge apologies for the delay in this. My muse decided to go on break for a wee while and I couldn't get him to work for a few weeks. Add on top of that I have a lot of homework I've been trying to get done for the past month or so, I haven't had a lot of time to write. Enjoy, and as always, please review.

**Soldier**

**Chapter Eight**

By eleven, Xander's stomach reminded him that he hadn't eaten since early the previous morning. At first he dismissed it and tried to concentrate on the words in front of him, but it was becoming harder and harder to ignore the stabbing pain. So far, he had gone over Finn's file several times, learning as much of it as his tired mind could comprehend. The guy had a decent record, been in the military since he was eighteen, assigned a variety of locations all over the world but mostly in the states. Nothing really stood out though, until six years before, he was assigned to a heavily classified project named ADAM. Although every time Xander attempted to get into the files, he was instantly kicked offline and his computer locked up for at least twenty minutes before he could get it back in order again. After he gave up on that one, he went through the rest of Finn's info and found that three years before, the project had been shut down and Finn had been reassigned to South America to wipe out a deadly virus of some kind.

His stomach growled again, and this time a heavy stab almost caused him to double over against the screen.

"Alright, already," he muttered, annoyed at himself but at the same time, he was starving, starving enough to actually go out and get something to eat instead of ordering out like he usually would if he was doing research. He shut down his computer with a resigned sigh and spent almost half an hour trying to root out his car keys from where he'd thrown them the previous night. They'd somehow ended up at the bottom of his travelling bag. Once he had them in his grip, he grabbed his jacket and headed out the door.

The corner across from the motel was clear, but as he headed towards his car, he glanced over at it again, the image of Willow and Forrest burned into his mind. What had they been talking about? Him? What he'd done? Why had Forrest brought Willow there the earlier?

The questions swirled around his mind as he drove towards the town centre while at the same time he was trying to figure out what would make a better lunch, a Big Mac or just a coffee. The Big Mac won and he found himself pulling into McDonalds, pausing to let a mother and child cross the road. The kid turned and smiled at him. He raised a hand and smiled back before pulling into a spot near the edge of the lot. He stopped then, wandering for a moment whether to go inside or just head through the Drive-Thru. School wasn't out yet, so the place was full of crying children and concerned mothers. The teenagers probably wouldn't show up until sometime after three when school got out.

He shook his head and started to get out of the car but stopped when he noticed a familiar face heading up the street.

Buffy started to hurry along the opposite side of the street and disappeared into a shop called the Magic Box. He stared after her for several seconds, wandering whether he should follow or not. She was most likely just out shopping for something. Yeah, she was just being a normal woman… and she was shopping for magic stuff. He shook his head and leaned back against the headrest. At least some people could afford to be ordinary. Buffy was probably looking for an amulet for protection or some herbs for Willow.

Deciding not to go in, he climbed out of his car and headed into McDonalds. Several minutes later he emerged carrying a Big Mac and a large Diet Coke. He had been right about the screaming toddlers. He couldn't remember a time that he'd seen that many kids in one room since he'd stumbled into an orphanage up in LA. Careful not to spill any Coke, he got back into the peace and quiet of his car and began to eat his meal. His eyes kept drifting to the Magic Box as he finished off his food in one bite and he was halfway through his drink when he saw Finn storm out of the shop and head off up the street. At the very least, the ex-army soldier looked pissed off.

Xander placed the drink carefully in one of the cup-holders and watched the door for signs of someone following Finn. The door swung shut slowly, almost mocking Xander as he glared at it. He switched his attention back to Finn and his hand automatically reached the gun stowed in the glove compartment as a plan formed in his mind. He could probably kill Finn and make it look like a mugging gone wrong. That way he could probably get out of this hell hole and go kill Ethan for sending him there in the first place.

He checked that the gun was loaded, stowed it in his belt and hopped out of the car. He made sure to lock it behind him as he jogged up the street, keeping a careful distance so that Finn hopefully wouldn't notice him. He knew that he was taking a huge chance and that if he got caught then his cover might be blown, but he had to do his job. It wasn't an option.

Finn rounded a corner and disappeared. Xander sped into a run and slowed down when he reached the alley entrance. He glanced around to check that no one was looking and ducked into the narrow alley. He managed to squeeze past some trashcans without making too much noise as Finn disappeared into a doorway at the end of the alley.

Xander paused then, sensing that something wasn't quite right. He reached for the gun in his belt and rested a hand on it, slowly taking a step forward. A shiver crept up his spine and he spun round, but nothing was there except the three over-flowing trashcans he'd just moved past. He pulled the gun out and held it in front of him as he crept further down the alley. He found that it opened out into a large empty loading area, with the wider road in front of him leading out. The place was eerily silent and devoid of life. Now he was sure that something wasn't right.

Glass shattered behind him and he turned as Finn barrelled into him. The wind was knocked out of him as he fell to the ground. Damn, the man had a hard shoulder. The gun went skittering off as Xander lost his grip on it. Finn stamped down on his hand, Xander felt the bones crushed under the other man's weight. With his other hand, he managed to reach up and hook it round Finn's knees, pulling the other man off balance. The two grappled around on the floor, landing punches and kicks and trying to avoid the others. Xander's vision started to blur and he realised that he must have hit his head on the way down. He lost his grip on Finn's neck and rolled onto his back, gasping for air as Finn stood and started landing kick after kick to his stomach, bruising his ribs and driving the air out of his lungs when he desperately needed it.

"Riley!" someone shouted. "That's enough! Leave him alone!"

That voice sounded so familiar. But it was so far away… A warm hand landed on his cheek as he gasped for air.

"Xander? Are you okay?" Willow? Or Buffy? Who was that?

"Riley, move!" Another voice called, and he felt a breeze against his stomach as his shirt was lifted up, exposing his skin. Above him, someone swore, obviously they had seen it now, although he doubted they knew exactly what the symbol was.

"What is that?"

"How can…"

"Xander?" the warm hand was now slapping his cheek as he tried to stay conscious. "How did you get that tattoo? _Where_ did you get it?"

He could feel the Big Mac and Coke coming back up his throat. Oh, shit, he realised, yeah, that was smart, eat and then go kill someone. And here he thought he'd learned that particular lesson back in Vegas. Bile rose at the back of his throat and he tried to roll over strong hands pulled him back. The voices were all blurred now. He couldn't tell them apart.

"Xander? How did you get that tattoo? What the fuck is going on here?"

It went on and on but he couldn't answer, he tried to swallow, but that only made the bile rise faster up his throat. He managed to pull away from the hands and vomited before falling into darkness.

**X**

His arms were tied behind his back again, ankles to the legs of the chair he was forced to sit on and a blindfold across his eyes denied him the image of his surroundings. He would've laughed at the irony of the situation if there wasn't a gag over his mouth. This was almost exactly what it had been like when Forrest had invaded his dreams, although this time his feet weren't cold at all since there was no water on the floor.

Far away, he could hear someone laughing, but couldn't hear anyone close by. Sighing, he started to grind his teeth into the gag, hoping that maybe he would be able to tear it and spit it out. He needn't have bothered as a moment later, the gag was removed and he felt a straw poke at his lips.

"Clever boy," someone said, as he gratefully drank up the water. He couldn't see who was holding the glass or mug or whatever it was but he was grateful anyway. He mumbled a 'thanks' when he was done. "You're welcome," the voice replied. He heard footsteps going back and forth behind him.

"Are you sure this is going to work?" the owner of the feet behind him asked.

"It's already working," another replied from in front of him. "Go ahead and ask if you don't believe me."

What was already working? Xander wandered, trying to turn his head so he could see who was behind him. What did they want to know? It was then that he remembered trying to kill Finn before and failing. The others must have tied him up to stop him from trying it again.

"Stop it," another voice said. A woman's voice, Xander realised it could either be Buffy or maybe Willow, since instantly the footsteps stopped. "Riley, Willow wants to talk to you. She's in the other room."

Oh yeah, definitely Buffy.

"Are you sure?" Finn asked warily. Xander smirked at the apprehension in his voice.

"I got him covered," a third voice replied. Xander forced back a smile as Finn obediently crossed what he assumed was a room and a door shut behind him.

"Xander," Buffy said from in front of him. "How did you get it?"

Xander remained silent. Get what?

"The Mark," Forrest clarified from somewhere to Xander's right.

"What mark?" Xander replied, hoping they weren't referring to what he thought they were referring to. If they were then he was going to have to do a lot more explaining than he wanted to do in a lifetime.

The blindfold was ripped from his face, revealing a very annoyed Buffy, and his shirt was lifted up. She pointed to the swirling lines on his stomach.

"That Mark," she hissed through gritted teeth.

He looked down, eyes slightly blurring from the bright light coming from above him. "Oh, that mark… Is it a crime to get a tattoo these days?" he asked, looking back up at her.

"Only if said tattoo is the symbol of the Slayer," she snapped back.

Tbc…


	9. Chapter Nine

Disclaimer: The only one that belongs to me is Forrest, all the others belong to Joss.

AN- I had hoped to get this chapter up last weekend, but sadly, my muse decided not to agree with my plans. Hopefully, this does answer a few questions and I hope that it does not create any more confusion. The end is drawing near! Anyways, please review, they seriously make my day.

**Soldier**

**Chapter Nine**

Xander glanced to his left. Forrest was standing in front of a large, heavy fire door, watching him curiously. To Xander's right was a solid brick wall that ran the length of the room and straight ahead was a very annoyed Slayer. He couldn't see what was behind her since she was so close to him, almost nose to nose. So his chances of escape were somewhere below zero and somewhere above dead. There was no way he could get out of this, so time to bluff, so it was.

"It's just a tattoo," he said with a shrug that he hoped they saw as casual. "I saw it down in Vegas, decided I liked it and got it. And there is no 'mark' of the Slayer."

Buffy's eyes narrowed and she took a step back. Forrest folded his arms and leaned against the wall.

"So tell me something," the black man said, raised one hand and pointed to the floor where Buffy was now standing. "What does that look like to you?"

Xander looked down and saw the same swirling lines that were on his stomach. They were painted on the floor in what Xander could only hope was not blood, although it looked a lot like it. He let out a sigh, trying vainly to come up with something to say to that when Buffy spoke.

"We had some trouble with a god a few years ago," she said, taking another step back so Xander had a full view of the mark on the floor. "So I went on this vision-quest thing to see if I could destroy her, the spell we used required us to paint this symbol on the floor in order to create some kind of marker so that I would know how to get back."

Xander bit his lip. He knew exactly what she was talking about, having performed one himself three years before. She had probably been connected to one of the women who had created the slayer, just like he had and they had explained to her where to get the power to destroy this 'god'.

"So why are you trying to kill Riley?" Forrest asked, cocking his head to one side.

The door behind Buffy opened, and Xander glanced up as Finn, Willow and Tara strode into the room. Tara, being the last one through, closed the door softly behind her and went to stand beside Willow. Buffy took a step back towards them and Willow told her something. Xander frowned at them when he made out what they'd said.

'Oz has gone to track down some of his friends, find out if they know anything about…'

Willow waved vaguely in his direction. Xander silently wandered what kind of 'friends' the werewolf had acquired and whether they would be any threat or not. He hoped not, but then again, werewolves usually only associated with their own kind so maybe he would have a whole pack on his scent. Just like old times, he thought and his eyes drifted back to the mark again.

"So why do you wanna kill me?" Finn asked, grabbing a chair from the corner of the room and straddling it. Xander watched him for a moment, chewing the inside of his cheek thoughtfully. Finn glared back at him with unmasked hatred, although there was sweat running down the side of his face. Xander narrowed his eyes and looked at the mark on the floor. Ethan was going to kill him if he found out what he was going to do.

"I don't know," Xander said at last. "I'm just a soldier, I do what they tell me. I'm not trained to ask questions on why people should die. I don't know about their plans."

Out of the corner of his eye, Xander noticed that Buffy, Willow and Tara were now watching him as well. He had the attention of the whole room now, but offered no more.

"Who are they?" Buffy asked, taking a step forward. Finn looked like he was going to say something but she cut him off with a glare.

"_They_ are the Guardians, the people who created the Slayer," Xander explained and closed his eyes. He was expecting a mental telling off from Ethan but instead he found himself in a dark room standing opposite someone. Forrest grinned at him and snapped his fingers.

Xander's eyes snapped open to find Buffy looking shocked and Finn glaring.

"You're lying," Finn growled, standing so fast the chair he'd been standing on fell over.

"No, he's not," Forrest said and approached. Buffy looked away and stepped back towards Willow and Tara. "I am curious though," Forrest said, coming to a stop beside Xander and crouching down beside him. "Why do you do it? According to the stories I've heard from your… friends, you are one of the friendliest people they know and you wouldn't hurt a soul. So why kill?"

Xander bit his lip hard enough to draw blood.

"Come on, you're not always this shy, are you?"

"I owe them," Xander muttered softly, head hanging in shame. "I do what they tell me because I need to repay them."

"Repay them for what?"

"Something I did, a long time ago…" Xander tried to bite his tongue, but the words kept coming, spilling off his lips and he could do nothing to stop them.

"Forrest!" Buffy yelled across the room, breaking whatever spells the warlock had put on him.

Xander let his head drop, and mentally berated himself for not remembering that the man was a very powerful warlock that had mastered hundreds of mind spells and was not afraid to use them. He heard Forrest go over to the others and them talking quietly between them for a few minutes. He could also feel Finn's gaze on him, anger and hate trying to penetrate into his mind and intimidate him.

When he finally looked up at them, they were all nodding one by one. He had obviously missed whatever had happened and frowned when they all turned to look at Willow. The redhead took a shaky step forward, and the others followed until they were all standing in a half-circle around him.

"So, what are you going to do with me?" he asked, looking at them one by one.

Willow cleared her throat nervously. "We're going to try a er… truth spell, to see if what you're saying is true."

He stared at her. They were not suggesting what he thought they were. She set several herbs on the ground between them and he saw that she was serious alright.

"Alright," he nodded, "But you're not going to find anything."

"Leave that for us to decide," Finn growled.

Xander closed his eyes and tried to relax his mind. It was going a thousand miles an hour but slowly he managed to calm down, using the exercises that always helped him to remain calm under pressure. He heard Willow mumbling in Latin, the others backing off to give her room for the spell – and so they wouldn't be caught up in it too – and then his mind was back at the beginning, when he had first left Sunnydale. Like a film on fast-forward, everything he had done rolled before him at lightning speed, everyone he had fought and killed, all the times he'd had to hide from the cops or from the Council idiots that they tried to send after him and even the times when Ethan had taught him new magic tricks. Finally, it stopped. He let out a breath and nodded at Willow, silently telling her that he was ready.

"Okay," Willow said as she kneeled down in front of him. Xander glanced at the others lingering warily around them, all watching him with various expressions on their faces: anger, hope, doubt, and blank. "Xander," Willow said softly. He turned to look back at her. She took a deep breath, probably to calm her nerves, he supposed, and she said, "Tell me why you want Riley Finn dead."

"I was ordered to kill him; it's not something _I_ want." Xander tried as hard as he could to stop the words, but he knew only too well how powerful this particular truth spell was. He searched vainly for a way to avoid the questions but came up blank. He could only hope that Willow would just centre her questions on Finn and not dig too deep into his past.

"By whom?" Willow asked, tilting her head to one side slightly, but just enough for him to catch the movement.

"The Guardians," he replied.

"Why?"

"Why was I ordered to kill him or why is he wanted dead?" he asked, smirking at her. He knew that some questions could be answered with other questions if they were not specific enough, like 'Why' for example. She had inadvertently created an opening for him, but he knew that she was smart enough to not make that mistake again.

She frowned at him and he knew that he was right. She hadn't taken into consideration that 'Why' could be answered in numerous ways and obviously, she hadn't been expecting him to know the ways around those questions.

"Why is he wanted dead?" she asked at last.

"I don't know; I'm not privy to that knowledge." He was really answering truthfully now. He had no idea why the Guardians wanted Finn dead, and it was not his place to ask why someone was supposed to die.

"Okay," Willow said, and glanced over at Buffy. The Slayer nodded in reply. Sighing, Willow turned back to Xander and seemed to steel herself for the question she was about to ask. "Why were you ordered, by the Guardians, to kill Riley Finn?"

"I work for them," he said quietly and offered no more. The words though, were on the tip of his tongue, but as much as he would have like to be able to tell Willow all his secrets again, he knew that doing so could possibly endanger her life and the others lives as well.

"Why do you work for them?" her voice was soft, probing gently into his mind.

"I owe them," he ground out through gritted teeth.

Willow frowned at him, and then glanced over at Buffy again. Xander refused to look, choosing instead to keep his eyes on the ground. His neck was beginning to ache from the awkward position, but he knew what Willow's next question would be, and he hated that he already had tears in his eyes.

"Why do you owe them?" her voice was gentle. Too soft, like she knew that something was wrong, that something was hurting him.

"I did something… a long time ago…" His throat was starting to tighten, and the tears were starting to slip out of his eyes. He forced them shut, willing the pain back. This was not something to be appearing here, maybe later he would cry his guilt out again and pray that wherever she was, she was safe now. He knew Willow wanted an answer, and opened his eyes again to look at her. She was watching him expectantly. He cleared his throat and whispered, "I killed someone."

Willow's eyes widened in surprise and Xander wandered whether Tara had told her about the 'vision' she'd seen. She looked truly shocked that he could do such a thing. She leaned in closer, and he had to strain to hear her voice over the others shifting and muttering in the background.

"You killed someone?" she asked, astounded.

"Yeah, I did," he growled at her. He was starting to get tired of her beating around the bush. He could see that she had another question on her mind, and the gears were turning in her smart head.

"Wait a minute," she muttered, and he could see that she had something. "How does this fit in with you working for the Guardians?"

He let out a breath. How to explain this one? He bit his tongue to stop himself from answering immediately. Finally, he worked out the easiest way to answer without breaking out into tears again.

"The girl I killed… she worked for the Guardians," he said, and added in a quiet voice, "And besides, it was an accident."

Willow turned away from him then, and looked over at Buffy again. He didn't bother to look to see how Buffy was going to reply. Instead, he continued in a low voice, unable to stop now that he had started talking about it.

"It was my fault, I didn't see it coming, didn't see _them_ coming. I turned my back for an instant and they killed her. I got her killed…"

He could feel everyone's eyes on him, and he felt his face heating up.

"How do you mean?" Willow asked softly.

"She wasn't supposed to die that night," he said, not looking at Willow. "She wasn't supposed to die for another few years, at least, but because of me, she is dead. And it's my fault. It's my fault she's dead." He took a deep breath and looked up at Willow. "I made a deal with them, the Guardians, because of what I did. I would work for them. I'd do whatever they told me to do, even if I hated it, even if I had to kill people that they wanted dead and I would do it until I either died or until they deemed I had done enough to repay them for letting her die."

Willow stared at him for at least a full minute or two after he'd finished speaking – enough to make him uncomfortable, anyway - before she nodded and closed her eyes. She muttered something in Latin that his tired mind recognised as the release spell. He let out a breath, grateful that he was now back in control of his own tongue and watched her gather up the various herbs and stones.

"Wait a minute," Finn said suddenly, stepping forward. "How exactly does this help me? I mean, you're not really going to take his word for it, are you?

"Were you actually paying attention to what Willow was doing?" Forrest asked back. Finn glared at the warlock and Buffy rolled her eyes at the two of them

"Cut it out, both of you," she cast a meaningful look at Forrest. The black man rolled his eyes and snapped his fingers

Once again, Xander found himself surrounded by darkness, dank water washing over his feet, gag over his mouth and blindfold covering his eyes. He let out a sigh; this was becoming real old, really fast.

Tbc…


	10. Chapter Ten

Usual disclaimer: Not mine, although Forrest is, the other characters aren't.

AN- I had major, major block with this chapter, although things seem to be coming together for now. Apologies for the long wait and for any mistakes there are in here, which there probably are lots of. Enjoy.

**Soldier**

**Chapter Ten**

They were talking about him. He was sure they were talking about him, although all he could actually hear was some kind of humming and it sounded like it was coming from far away. He couldn't make out words, but it did sound like voices, purposefully blurred by magic. They'd been talking for some time now, if the ache in his muscles was any indication. He tried pulling on the restraints again, but that only made the pain flare up his arms again. Annoyed, he swung his head around to yell at the restraints. It was a childish thing to do, he knew that, but as he turned, he froze.

"He got around the spell, then!"

Finn's voice was clear as day in his head, making his ears ring at the unexpected noise. His head snapped around again, and the voice disappeared, leaving only the static hum in its wake. He almost growled in annoyance, only the gag stuffed in his mouth and the revelation that struck him stopped him.

Again, he turned his head to the side, tilting it at an angle and sure enough:

"There's no way anyone can get around that spell!"

Willow's voice was like pure music to his ears. He tried another angle, tilting his head backwards to the other side.

"He might be able to…"

Forrest. And again, tilting his head all the way forward, he heard Buffy's voice:

"Do what, exactly?"

It worked like a radio receiver, picking up one signal in one position, and a completely different one in another. Several minutes of figuring out which position matched which voice and Xander was able to pick up on the conversation pretty quickly, considering it was him that they were arguing about.

"There is a way to get around truth spells." Forrest's muttering was barely audible, like he was holding his hand up over his mouth or maybe thinking out loud and he didn't realise he was doing it, Xander couldn't be sure which.

"Oh really? Well why couldn't you tell us this before?" Finn sounded a little more than pissed off.

"Riley!" Buffy, sounding even more pissed off.

"Certain people have a natural ability to block out magic. They can do this unconsciously, if they are unaware of the fact they can do, or they can do it on purpose. It's just like some people are barely affected by hypnosis whereas others can go deep under in a matter of seconds." Forrest again. Xander raised an eyebrow at how Giles-like the man sounded and tilted his head to see what the others thought about it.

"Really?" Willow sounded surprised.

"You are kidding me, right?" Finn, mildly annoyed.

"Tell me that was a joke." Buffy, really annoyed.

Xander rolled his eyes at all of them. He knew he didn't have the ability to block out magic, consciously or unconsciously, the fact that Forrest had been able to put this spell on him was proof of that. He wriggled at the restraints again, but somehow only succeeded in pulling them even tighter than they were before. His shoulders groaned in protest as his arms were yanked even further around the back of the chair and he wished he had something solid to bite on so he could get his mind off the pain.

A breeze washed over his back, and on instinct, he turned his head to see where it had come from. Soft splashes reached his ears and the feeling he was being watched sent cold shivers up his spine.

"You're good," a voice said from above him.

Xander jerked his head up, wincing as his neck disagreed with the sudden movement, and groaned when the restraints pulled at his arms. He frowned though, when the breeze came again over the other side of his face, and the splashes faded. Still frowning, Xander tilted his head to the side to see what the others were talking about. Forrest had to be the one that had just spoken, it was his spell and he probably knew all the ways to manipulate the surroundings to his own advantage. The warlock was silent though, and as Xander threw his head back in frustration, he caught another voice:

"What's he doing?" The other witch. What was her name? His memory was usually good at retrieving names, but either this witch was good at being forgotten or his head was still smarting from the fight before. Whatever it was, he couldn't remember for the love of his car what her name was.

"Can he hear us?" Buffy. She almost sounded scared.

"Maybe… Wanna wake him up and ask him?" Forrest. Sarcasm wasn't one of his greatest traits, Xander noted.

"Is that wise?" Willow, like Buffy, sounded almost scared. Definitely apprehensive.

"Let's find out." Forrest again. Not apprehensive, not scare, almost amused, like he was enjoying this and wasn't willing to admit it.

Xander rolled his eyes as Forrest began muttering something under his breath.

The restraints disappeared, as did the gag and blindfold. Xander blinked at the sudden onslaught of light and out of habit rubbed one wrist with the other hand. He knew that the illusion had all been in his head, even the water that had come up to his ankles, but the realness of it had him wandering whether Forrest could probably take over the world with one spell. The thing that worried him though, was whether the warlock actually would or not.

Xander looked at Finn, who was glaring at Forrest with unabashed hatred. Buffy stepped between them before they could pick a fight and Xander raised an eyebrow as she placed her hands on her hips – purposefully elbowing the two men either side of her – and glared at him. He started to stand, but one look at the three of them reaching for various weapons made him pause and sit back down again.

"I take it you heard everything," Buffy said, now folding her arms.

"Pretty much," Xander replied, nodding his head. He bit at his lip for a moment, wandering whether to tell them about a certain someone who could verify whose side he was on or not.

"And…?" Finn moved forward, eyebrows rising in expectation.

"And if you're so confused, there might be someone who can alleviate your… fear." Xander replied, smirking.

Finn took a few steps back, glancing over his shoulder at Buffy. Forrest circled behind her, watching Xander with dark eyes.

"Who?" Buffy asked at last.

Xander took a deep breath, and prayed that he wouldn't be committing suicide with what he was about to tell them.

"Giles," he said at last. "He knows everything. What's going on, where I've been, what I've been doing, who I've been killing and so on."

Buffy looked like she'd been sucker-punched in the gut. Finn's eyebrows disappeared into his hairline and Forrest simply glanced over at the blonde, bored. Xander took the opportunity to glance around for Willow, but neither she nor the other witch was in the room. He sent a quick frown at the door that presumably led to another room before turning back to Buffy and co.

"What?" Buffy asked at last.

"Giles," Xander repeated, sighing. "As in Rupert Giles, your watcher, the one who's in England right now on that urgent conference?"

"Y-You're lying!" Buffy whispered, "You've gotta be lying. Giles—he wouldn't…"

Xander raised an eyebrow. "He wouldn't what?"

"He's not lying," Forrest said from the other side of the room. "He's telling the truth."

Finn whirled round, but Buffy cut him off.

"Are you sure?" she demanded, taking a step towards him.

"Yes," Forrest said with a nod, and gestured to the powder lying at Willow's feet. "He's still slightly under the influence of the truth spell that Willow did before. Whatever he says is true."

Xander glanced over his shoulder at the warlock and then back to Buffy. She turned away before he could get a good look at her, but he caught the broken expression on her face as she headed for the door. He winced as it slammed shut behind her.

So, that was that particular cat out of the bag. He wandered how long it would be before Buffy stormed back in and demanded to know where Ethan was, or if Giles would even tell her about Ethan at all. He turned in the chair to face Forrest, who was leaning against the wall by a stack of blue mats.

"That true?"

Xander turned back to face Finn to find the other man glaring down at him. "Is what true?" he replied.

"The spell… thing…" Finn paced back and forth in front of him, wringing his hands and curling them into fists. "Is it true?"

Xander looked down at the dust and kicked at it. There was nothing magical about it, it was just dust, probably sawdust or something. There was a stone underneath it all though.

"Maybe," he said, leaning down to pick the stone up. It was cold to his touch, just a normal stone. He let it drop back to the floor and sat up again.

"Maybe?" Finn echoed. He stopped in his pacing, ran a hand through his hair and said, "Okay, then, why do you wanna kill me?"

"Riley!" Forrest growled from the back of the room.

"I want to know," Finn replied, ignoring Forrest completely.

Xander raised an eyebrow at the argument but chose to stay quiet. The last thing he wanted to do was to annoy a warlock powerful enough to mess with his mind.

"Riley!" Willow appeared at the doorway. All three men turned to her. She glanced between them before her gaze returned to Finn and she jerked her head towards the room behind her. Taking the hint, Finn headed towards her. The door shut quietly behind them.

Xander let out a breath and turned to look at Forrest. "Where are we?"

Forrest rolled his eyes and strolled over to the door. He checked it and stayed there, eyes closed as if he was listening carefully, which he probably was. Xander watched him for a moment before Forrest moved away from the door and over to a cabinet full of weapons.

"So how'd you do it?" he asked, opening the cabinet and removing a couple of stakes.

Xander eyed the weapons warily as he replied, "Do what?"

"You managed to get out of the spell," Forrest said, tossing one of the stakes in the air and catching it. The warlock frowned down at it and placed it back on it's shelf with the other one. He folded his hands and leaned back against the cabinet as he said, "You were listening to us before."

"Oh," Xander chuckled wryly, wandering how to get out of that one. "That."

"So how did you do it?"

Xander shrugged and ran a hand through his hair, grimacing slightly when his fingers ghosted over the slight bump from where his head had hit the ground before. He was saved from answering though, when the door opened and Buffy walked in, closely followed by Willow, the other witch and Oz.

"Hey," the werewolf said. Xander raised a hand in greeting before quickly dropping it back to his side when Buffy folded her arms.

"Well?" Forrest asked Buffy.

"You tell us," she replied. She glared at Xander as she spoke, though. He could see the hate in her eyes, as well as the unshed tears and wandered if she'd actually called Giles at all.

Forrest sighed and muttered something about going to get a drink. Before anyone could stop him, he had disappeared through the heavy fire-door to Xander's left.

"That was helpful," Finn said as he came into the room.

Buffy rolled her eyes and rubbed a hand over her face. She stared at Xander for several moments before turning to Willow and Tara. Willow shrugged and Tara looked away.

"Fine," the slayer said at last. She turned back to Xander, face cold as she spoke, "Giles told us everything, about the Guardians and about the girl."

Xander kept silent. He had a feeling the watcher hadn't told them exactly everything, considering Buffy hadn't mentioned Ethan yet. He was surprised Forrest hadn't either. The warlock had to know that Ethan was around, with all the magic going on in town. He was still trying to figure out whether she'd actually called Giles though, but the fact that she'd just admitted that the watcher had told them everything made him think that she had.

"The deal's this," Buffy said, drawing Xander's attention back to the present. "You don't go near Riley, at all, until we figure out why the Guardians want him dead, and we let you go."

Xander frowned at that. "Define 'let you go'."

"We let you go, leave you alone, until we can figure out why there's a hit out on Riley," she explained.

Xander watched her for a moment, and then looked over at Willow and the blond. Oz was watching him as well. Finn was behind them, arms folded and glaring at the wall. If needed, he could always track Finn down later and kill him, but he was running out of time. He wasn't even sure how long he had left before he met his deadline. He couldn't afford to waste anymore time under that spell.

With a sigh, Xander turned back to Buffy and nodded, "Deal."

Tbc…


	11. Chapter Eleven

Disclaimer: Xander and the characters you recognise do not belong to me. The ones you don't know are mine.

AN- My original plan for this story has been completely shot to hell thanks to the last chapter, so this fic will be ending in about two or three chapters, just as soon as I can wrestle muse into writing them. Enjoy and please review.

**Soldier**

**Chapter Eleven**

They let him out through the back door, the one that Forrest had gone out through before and Xander cast a wary look around the service area, wandering whether the warlock had set up any traps or not. The way seemed clear at first glance, and he carefully took a step towards the nearest alley, eager to get back to see how much time he had wasted.

"Hey!"

Xander turned back at the sound of Buffy's voice to see her and Finn standing in the doorway. Buffy raised an eyebrow at Finn, who almost looked like he was about to argue back but quickly gave up when she raised the other one too.

Reluctantly, he reached behind his back and brought out a pair of guns. Xander would recognise those guns anywhere and quickly caught them when Finn threw them at him. Smiling, Xander strapped the guns back in place and smirked at Finn.

"Just go," Buffy said, pulling the door shut.

Xander frowned at the metal as it slammed against the frame. She looked sad, really, really sad, like when Angel had turned into Angelus, the only difference being she'd been pretty angry back then too. Shaking his head to get rid of the memories, he ran a hand through his hair and started up the alley. When he pulled his hand away, he noticed the smell that clung to his clothes. Little change in plan, he decided, the first thing he would do when he got back to the motel, would be to get a long, hot shower, and go from there.

-

When he got back to the motel, everything was a mess. Someone had been and gone through his bags, upended the bed and thrown his clothes all over the place. One of his shirts was even hanging off the cheap TV, another was lying at the bottom of the shower, soaking wet and a pair of his pants had been pulled inside and out and twisted into a knot.

He stared at the mess for a moment before starting to search for his other bag, the one with all his magical supplies in it. Pulling his clothes off the floor and the various places they'd all ended up, he dumped them on the bed while checking every place he could think of. He found the bag under his bed, with a holly branch sticking out of the zipper and breathed a sigh of relief when he pulled it out. The holly meant that Ethan had been there and moved it to a safe place. The bed had fallen on it when it had been moved.

He shoved some of his clothes off the bed and sat, rummaging around in the bag, checking all his supplies were still there. Nothing seemed to be missing. Breathing a sigh of relief, he set it back on the bed and headed for the bathroom. The shower still seemed to work, although something that looked a lot like the soap had been flushed down the toilet.

After taking a quick shower and changing into a clean pair of pants, he grabbed the bag again and pulled out his computer. He only had a few hours to figure out where the hell Finn was and kill him. He knew that if he failed, Cleaners would be sent in to completely obliterate Finn, and everyone within a hundred yards of him. He shivered at the memory of the Cleaners and how cold they'd been the last time he'd encountered them.

Pushing the memory from his mind, he started tapping at his computer, trying to hack into the security databases of any shop up the main street. Chances were most of them had video surveillance cameras and Finn would probably be in that magic shop. Xander doubted the shop would have any kind of electrical security, it was most likely covered with magic spells and alarms rather than cameras and motion detectors, but one could never be so sure.

Twenty minutes and hardly any footage later, Xander froze. He'd been halfway through watching a video from the fast food restaurant across the street which showed Finn entering the Magic Box when the hairs on the back of his neck stood on end.

Someone was watching him.

He slammed the computer shut and stuffed it back into the bag. Grabbing a shirt off the bed next to him, he pulled it on and headed over to the window. Standing across the intersection on the corner, were Buffy and Forrest. A few minutes later they were joined by another who he couldn't quite make out. Forrest was shaking his head while Buffy seemed to be saying something. Her face was hidden by the third person but Xander could see her hands moving, as if she were trying to explain something to them. Seeming to give up, Forrest threw his hands into the air and began to walk off. Buffy followed. The third person stood for a moment watching them before hurrying after them.

A shiver ran up Xander's spine and he pulled away from the window. There was something about that third figure that he didn't like. Something just wasn't… right about it. He ran a hand over his face and when he looked again, the figure was gone and the street light was flickering on and off.

He frowned at it and turned back to the room. It was still a mess. He dug the computer out of his bag and set it up to do an automatic search to see where Finn might be staying and turned to the room.

Twenty minutes later, there was a knock on the door. Xander had been half-way through folding and packing his clothes into his bag when he heard it. He dropped the clothes, grabbed the computer, stuffed it into the bag and kicked it under the bed out of the way. Checking everything was where it should be, he carefully approached the door and stood to one side as the knock came again, a little louder this time. Reaching into his pocket, he rested a hand on the butt of his gun and checked the peep-hole.

Riley Finn was standing on the other side.

Frowning, he watched as Finn raised a hand and thumped the door again. Xander kept still, wandering what the hell Finn was doing. Finn glanced over his shoulder and slammed a fist against the door. Xander raised a hand and unlocked the door. Finn stepped back as the door opened and Xander stepped into the doorway.

"Xander," Finn said, glancing over his shoulder again.

"Finn," Xander replied.

"Can I er… come in?"

Xander studied him for a moment and stepped out of the doorway to give Finn room to pass. He didn't take his hand off his gun.

"Sure."

Finn glanced round the room, giving it a once over. Xander stepped round him and went back to his bag.

"You leaving?"

"Soon."

"After you kill me."

Xander paused. "Yeah."

A disc landed on the bed next to him.

"There's some stuff on that that you might want to see."

Xander eyed the disc and zipped up the bag, ignoring it.

"Does Buffy know you're here?"

"No. She doesn't need to either."

Xander raised his eyebrows at that. Finn had come to him, without Buffy's approval, knowing that he was going to die? The guy was nuts. Or he had nothing to lose. Xander was betting on the latter. He turned to face Finn, sitting down on the bed. Finn had his hands by his sides, watching Xander warily. Xander reached round his side and pulled out his gun.

"Would you kill for the people you love? Or die for them?" he asked, checking the slide.

Finn stared at him blankly. "What?"

Xander cocked the gun. "Would you?"

"Yeah, I would."

Xander sighed and slid off the bed, reaching under it to grab his other bag. He dumped it on the bed and turned his back on Finn to check the room, making sure he hadn't left anything behind.

"Look, I er… Buffy told me a little bit about you. From before…"

Xander palmed the weapon in his hands, wandering whether he should just leave now and disappear. At the back of his mind though, he knew he couldn't. The Guardians would hunt him down within a few hours and have him killed, probably by the Cleaners. Sighing, he turned around and his fingers called around the grip.

Finn froze mid-sentence, his eyes going to the gun.

Xander raised the weapon and pulled the trigger.

Tbc...


	12. Chapter Twelve

Usual disclaimer, not mine, except for Forrest.

AN- This story is going to kill me, I swear. Enjoy and please review.

**Soldier**

**Chapter Twelve**

Xander expected surprise, or maybe even a little bit of anger, or fear, to appear on Finn's face as he was shot. There was only surprise. Finn's hands came up, resting on the bleeding hole in his chest and he fell to the ground with a sharp thud. Xander approached the other man slowly and kept his gun trained on Finn's head. He'd misjudged the height, ever so slightly, and the bullet had entered just above the heart. Without a doubt it had nicked an artery, but it hadn't done what Xander had hoped it would and kill Finn instantly. He hated standing around while a life was taken. But this time, he didn't have a choice.

Within moments, Finn was staring blankly at the ceiling.

Xander sucked in a breath and let it out very slowly. He threw the gun on the bed and crouched down next to the deceased. There was blood everywhere. And a body in the middle of the room. This was going to be fun, he thought as he grabbed Finn's ankles and pulled him towards the door. He grimaced at the trail of blood that he was leaving on the cheap carpet and kicked the door open behind him.

Many strange things had happened in Sunnydale over the years, leaving most of the residents blissfully ignorant of what happens when the sun goes down and so no one gave Xander any notice as he dragged the body out to his car and dumped it in the back seat. Out of habit – and just to be sure – Xander checked that no one had paid any unwanted attention before locking the motel room and heading out to dump the body.

He figured the shore would be as safe a place as any and dragged Finn down to the sea line. From the looks of the wet sand and rocks, the sea was just heading out so Xander simply threw the body out into the water and watched it sink beneath the waves. He didn't particularly care if anyone found it anytime soon since he was leaving town for good within a few hours. He had no doubt it would show up after a few days anyway, probably caught on the rocks or maybe dragged by a speedboat or something like that.

He returned to the motel less than an hour later to find the blood starting to dry into the carpet and glared down at it. Blood could be a bastard to get out unless done right, and after checking the bathroom, he didn't find any bleach or anything that might help him. A brief run to the store down the street and a good few hours of scrubbing at the crap carpet left Xander with sore arms and a clean streak a couple of feet wide leading from the other side of the bed to the door.

Xander glanced at the clock, surprised that it was almost half eleven. He only had about a half hour before the cleanup crew would arrive and take over. Groaning at the thought of the Cleaners, he grabbed the phone and dialed Ethan's number.

"What the bloody hell do you want?" Ethan grumbled into the phone.

"Good morning to you to," Xander replied, biting back a yawn.

"You done?"

"Yeah…" Xander sighed and glanced down at the disc that Finn had left. Out of curiosity, he loaded it into the laptop and watched as his computer automatically played the files.

A room appeared on the monitor, a while sterile room with a screen on one side. A moment later, a Kethlon demon, similar to the one he'd seen the other night, was shoved inside. Images began to appear on the screen. Some, the Kethlon lunged at and others it ignored. The camera recorded everything, even when the demon twisted round to lick at its haunches, it was shot with a yellow dart and fell to the floor.

The room disappeared, and was replaced by a vampire with a chain attached to the back of its neck. There were people standing just out of reach, making notes on clipboards as the vampire growled or roared. Behind them, in the dark, Xander could only just make out a massive bass speaker. The vampire twisted and tried to get the chain out of his neck. Xander felt a chill sweep over him when he remembered the big vampire from the club; the one with the scar on the back of his neck.

A small cat like demon appeared next and a spider demon jumped down on it. Again, people behind glass screens took notes on clipboards. Although what they were looking for, Xander had absolutely no idea.

Spike, strapped to a table, was having his skin burned off inch by inch while they watched it re-grow in front of them under a pale light.

Next, a werewolf attacked a number of vampires and ripped them to shreds within seconds.

"HEY! IS ANYONE HOME!"

Xander jerked the phone away from his ear and stared at the image on screen. It was of Spike again, only this time he was in some kind of torture chamber and being prodded with hot irons. His face contorted in pain, unable to shift into his vampire visage because of the skin grafts.

"Jesus…" Xander breathed.

"What?" Ethan asked.

"Er… I'm gonna need another day or two here."

"What? Why?"

"Something's come up," Xander replied icily.

"Okay… you have… another twenty four hours before you need to start your next job."

"Fine with me."

He disconnected and threw the phone onto the bed before Ethan could ask what he was doing. Things were not fine at all if that was what had happened in Sunnydale since he'd left. No wander Willow had been pretty reluctant to say anything about it. He felt his stomach turn as he stared at the computer screen. Willow had said that they'd destroyed the Initiative, but some of the videos were date-stamped and almost all had been recorded within the past two weeks.

**X**

There were over thirty files in all, each more horrifying than the last, almost all with people just standing around taking notes. Vampires, werewolves, even ordinary animals were experimented on in the worst kind of way. By the end of it, there was a hole in the bottom of Xander's stomach and he found himself throwing up in the toilet. Gripping the sides of the sink, he stared at his reflection, wandering how the hell those people could just stand there and watch. If those demons were human, he knew that place would have been ordered to close down years ago but still… The thought that there was that kind of cruelty in the world still astounded him.

The computer beeped.

He threw water on his face and headed back through to see what it had come up with. The video files weren't the only files on the disc. There was also encrypted data, a lot of encrypted data. He set up a program to decrypt it and while he waited, looked at the clock and wandered just what the hell had happened to Sunnydale.

An email alert startled him out of his reverie and he stared at the screen. It had come from an anonymous source and was marked 'Important'. The virus scanner had cleared it, so he opened it and read the message:

_This is something you might find interesting… Click Me!_

_PS- Meadowbank Cemetery is such a curious place, isn't it?_

He frowned at the message, wandering who had sent it and why before he muttered, "What the hell…" and clicked the link. He was taken to one site and then redirected to another where he found himself looking at a building plan. A very detailed plan for a building that had to be at least the size of four or maybe five football pitches put together. Long winding corridors snaked around hundreds of rooms, some small, some massive, air vents and pipes ran up and down the building and after some scrolling around, Xander discovered that at the very top, there were several air vents that seemed to lead to nowhere, until he looked closer and realized that at the ends of those 'vents' were doors.

The plans were for a massive underground structure. And no one built anything underground unless they really did not want anyone else to know about it.

He looked at the email. Meadowbank… if Xander remembered right, that wasn't too far from the main street, or the old college, for that matter. He stared at the plans again, and then looked at the email. He clicked around for a while on the plans, and found that he could access a 'bird's eye view' of the top of the structure. The doors were all marked, and he zoomed out as far as he could go, staring at the screen and trying to make sense of why someone would send him this and tell him that...

Meadowbank.

He grabbed a tourist map out of his bag and held it up over the screen. He had to zoom in a couple of times but there it was. There were seven exits in all. Two led out to warehouses downtown, one to a bookstore up the main street, three led to the old college, one to a cemetery on the other side of town and the last led straight into the middle of Meadowbank.

An access point, somebody had sent him an access point to an underground building that someone else didn't want found.

Tbc…


	13. Chapter Thirteen

Disclaimer: The usual, characters you recognise are not mine.

AN- There are days when I could kill my muse but unfortunately, I need him to help me finish this story. As usual, comments and criticisms are greatly appreciated.

**Soldier**

**Chapter Thirteen**

He spent almost half an hour trying to decide if going out to Meadowbank was a good idea. For all he knew, it could be a trap. Someone could have been watching him kill Finn – probably were still watching him now – and decided that he needed to pay for it by setting him up to die. Then again, it could just be Ethan playing his practical jokes again. It was this last thought that made Xander grab all his things, take them out to the car, throw them in the trunk and head out to Meadowbank.

Along the way, he stopped at a hardware and electrical store, picked the lock and gathered what he needed. A lot of wires, a small alarm clock, a number of connectors and clips, a roll of tape, and numerous other items that he would need were stuffed into a couple of bags and thrown over his shoulder. Luckily, he didn't run into anyone on the way out, no sensible person would be out at three a.m. anyway unless they were a demon, and dumped everything in his car.

He drove over to the cemetery and parked a few blocks away so as – he hoped anyway – not to arouse suspicion. He checked the street before muttering a small incantation under his breath. Fire flicked between his fingers and he slowly turned his hands over and pressed his palms together. Sweat dripped off of them and onto his pants but he ignored it. The heat disappeared and he carefully separated his hands, smiling down at the red powder all over his skin. This stuff was more powerful than fifty sticks of dynamite thrown together and yet it was completely harmless so long as you didn't set it on fire. Careful not to spill any, he muttered another incantation and began to rub his palms together until the powder turned to clay and he could break small pieces off and shape them into blocks.

He cut the ends off the wires and taped them into place, wound them up into a coil and placed them back in the bag he was taking with him. Just as he slipped his hand into his other bag to make the detonator, a tap at the window startled him. He reached for his gun and pointed it over his shoulder without looking up but the tapping came again.

"Look, buddy…." He spun round to find Spike staring in through the window, grinning at him.

"Roll the window down," Spike growled through the glass.

Still keeping one hand on his gun, Xander did so slowly, and struggled not to wince as Spike smirked at him, stretching his lizard-like skin over his bones.

"I see you got my message," the demon growled softly.

"_You_ sent that email?" Xander asked, raising an eyebrow in disbelief.

"Just because I've got claws," Spike replied, folding his arms and leaning on the frame, "Doesn't mean I don't know how to keep up with the times, mate."

"Why?"

Xander's grip tightened on the weapon in his hands as he noticed there were several demons surrounding the car. Most seemed to be vampires, but there were a few he wasn't sure about. There was one that was along his peripheral that made the hairs on the back of his neck stand on end.

"I've been hearing some interesting things about you," Spike drawled, casting a curious eye over the inside of the car. "And I want to talk to you about something."

"Why here?" Xander asked, holding Spike's gaze.

"Why not here?" Spike replied with a shrug of one shoulder.

Xander was silent, eyeing the figure that had started to circle closer. The nearer it came, the more unsettled Xander felt. There was something not quite right about it.

"What was it you wanted to talk about?" Xander asked. He glanced in the rearview but the figure had disappeared from sight.

"That was… an interesting show you put on behind the Bronze," Spike said as he dug around in his pockets. He brought out his cigarettes and lit one up. "A little bird told me that spell is… unconventional, to say the least."

"Really?" Xander raised an eyebrow. "What else did this 'little bird' tell you?"

Drusilla suddenly materialized next to Spike. Xander had to force himself not to bolt into the other seat and forcibly loosened the grip he had on his gun.

"You're a little killer now," she said, grinning at him. "You kill for money. Sport. You like it. Live for it."

Xander's grip tightened on his gun and he forced his eyes back to Spike even as Drusilla leaned in close and whispered to him.

"The blood will never come out. It'll always be there."

"Spike—" he tried to interrupt, to get Spike's attention, but the demon was watching a building across the street.

"It's your fault."

Xander froze. He stared at Drusilla, who smiled at him and stood slowly, straightening out her dress. Spike was frowning at them both and a third vampire stepped up to them.

"Sire, we might have a problem," it said, visibly shaking as Spike glared at it.

"What problem?"

"The wolf, it's close."

"Well, go and chase it away!" Spike snapped at the smaller vampire. It nodded and took off. "Kill it, if you can!" Spike yelled after the fleeing vamp, and pointed at two others to follow. Scratching one side of his face, he turned back to Xander and smirked, "Damn dog's always sniffing after us, trying to find our lair."

"Right…"

"So what are you going to do now?" the demon asked, again folding his arms and leaning on the door.

Xander held up the red blocks.

"You know what this is?"

Spike sniffed the air and shook his head.

"It's an explosive. Finn gave me a disc before he… died. There were a number of videos on it."

"Guy came through after all," Spike muttered under his breath. He was close enough for Xander to hear and the human frowned. Drusilla turned back to Spike and slid an arm around him.

"What do you mean?" Xander asked with a frown. The first feelings of guilt over killing Finn tried to sneak its way out of the box Xander had buried them in.

Spike stared at him for a moment before he shook his head.

"It's nothing. Doesn't matter now anyway."

"Look, Spike, I am going to destroy whatever remains of that place. Blow it all to hell, where it belongs."

Spike looked at Dru. She was stroking the lizard half of his face, deep in a trance.

"Alright," he said, and picked out one of the vampires. "You, go back to the lair and tell everyone that we're moving house. Take them out of town and to LA. Tell Peaches that we need a place to hole up for the day." The vampire took off without a word and Spike turned to Dru. "And you, go with them."

Drusilla pouted and leaned close. Xander frowned at them as she whispered something in his ear. He smirked and kissed her softly before turning to the human.

"C'mon, mate," he said, and banged on the roof of the car. The remaining vampires closed in and Xander got a look at them. There were seven in all, including Spike. All of them seemed to be fighters, carrying various weapons from swords to guns. One even had a small whip with metal hooks on one end.

"What are you doing?" Xander asked, frowning.

"If you're going to do this, you're going to need a lot of help," Spike replied, staring down at him. "That place is huge, and stretches pretty much all under town, so you're going to need at least a few men to help you out with setting those explosives. You're also going to need to know where to put them, those plans don't show you the guard rotation or exactly what's what down there, so you're going to need someone who knows the layout. Someone who has been down there and escaped more times than he cares to count… So," he folded his arms and smirked, "you want my help or not?"

Tbc…


	14. Chapter Fourteen

Disclaimer: None of the characters you recognize belong to me.

AN: This chapter was hell to write and the next is the last one, so enjoy and please review.

**Soldier**

**Chapter Fourteen**

Xander had no idea why he agreed to it, but he found himself accepting Spike's offer and carefully getting out of the car. He slung his bag over one shoulder and made sure he locked his car behind him. There would be no way any of Spike's lackeys would be getting into his baby. Spike was still leaning against the car as Xander muttered a small spell under his breath to make sure that no demon could get near the car without some consequence.

"So exactly how did you plan to destroy that place on your own?" Spike asked. Xander smirked as the metal that the demon was leaning on started to heat up. Spike didn't notice as he took a drag from his cigarette and looked at Xander.

"Figured I'd use dumb luck," Xander replied with a grin. "It's worked before."

"So I've heard."

Spike sucked in a breath and frowned, then looked at the car beside him. Growling, he stood up and brushed at his coat, which had almost caught fire. Some of the leather came away in his hand from where it had completely dried out and he glared at Xander.

"Gotta protect my best asset," Xander grinned at him.

Spike smirked back at him.

"So you do know magic, eh? Was beginning to think it was all a joke."

"What was?" Xander asked calmly.

Spike pointed to a demon that was covered in scales. "He said that you performed quite a dangerous spell back there at the Bronze, something called the winds of chaos or something."

"I did," Xander replied solemnly.

Spike raised an eyebrow. "Well then, let's get going, shall we?"

-

It didn't take long for the group to reach the cemetery. Xander stayed a few steps behind Spike as the hybrid led the way. There was one question that he still wanted an answer to: What had Spike meant before, when he'd said that Finn had come through? No matter how many times he'd gone over it, the only answer Xander had come up with was that Spike and Finn had partnered up somehow and that Finn was supposed to help Spike with something. He pushed it to the back of his mind, and reminded himself that thinking about it would only distract him, and distractions were the last thing he needed right at that moment in time.

As they entered the cemetery, several other vampires joined them and Spike stopped next to an old crypt. Xander frowned and glanced around at the group, which was now almost twice as big as it was before. The new vamps weren't armed, but there were enough of them to take him out if Spike ordered it. Just to be safe, Xander twisted his hand around under his jacket and grabbed a hold of the small cross he had stashed there. If this was a trap after all, he planned to keep as many as he could as far away as he could while he summoned the winds to help him.

"So, plan's this," Spike pulled out his cigarettes and lit one. "We go in through the air vents, put bombs all over the place and kill as many humans as we can without raising the alarm. Kell and Zed will head down to the generators and destroy them manually. Soon as everyone's out we blow the place. Questions?"

"Yeah, I got one," a tall vampire raised an arm. "Where'll we get the bombs?"

"And what's with him?" a second vampire pointed at Xander. "Can we eat him?"

"No," Spike replied. "And he's the one with the bombs so if you want to get rid of that place, you're gonna have to leave him alone for now."

"Really," the tall one leered at Xander. Xander pulled back his jacket to reveal one of his guns. The vampires snickered. "They're not gonna do much to us, we're vampires, remember. Lead's not gonna kill us."

"Maybe not," Xander replied, letting his jacket fall back around his side. "But lead bullets wreathed in silver nitrate and garlic might just hurt a lot."

"Any other questions?" Spike asked before there could be a fight.

"Yeah, I got one," one of the scaled demons raised a hand. "After this is all done, can we kill the human?"

"If we get out alive," Spike replied. "Now can we get on with it?"

Murmurs of assent went around the group and Spike held out his hand to Xander. Xander raised an eyebrow before he slipped the bag off his shoulder and held it out. Spike reached in and started dishing out the bombs to the others.

"One more thing, can we kill any of them?" This came from a young-looking vampire standing near the back of the group.

"Yeah, if they see you." Spike cocked his head at Xander. "You got a problem with that?"

"No." Xander replied.

-

Xander wasn't sure exactly how they did it, but two big vampires that could have been body-builders or wrestlers managed to squeeze into the narrow air shaft and didn't seem to have a problem as they descended head first down into the darkness. The small vampire motioned for Xander to follow them and he went down into the darkness while the small one and the snake demon kept watch on the graveyard above.

When the shaft leveled out, Xander had to pause to get his bearings and wait for the blood to move to the rest of his body. The others moved swiftly on ahead, following Spike through the maze and Xander followed after checking that none of the explosives had fallen out of his pockets.

After half an hour of crawling through the vents, Xander dropped down through the opening that the others had gone through and landed in a crouch on the floor. He found himself in a box room with nothing but a single bed, meticulously made and an armoire squeezed into the corner. Spike was waiting for him.

Without a word, the demon jerked his head and disappeared though the door. Now they were in, and Xander watched as the two bigger vampires, each with a smaller partner, headed off down one way of the corridor while him, Spike and four others went the other way.

As soon as they reached an intersection, two of the vampires headed off in another direction while Spike hid an explosive up in a corner of a doorway. Silently, they went deeper into the building and down a flight of stairs. Xander placed an explosive under one of the steps and followed the other three through a doorway and out into another corridor.

The other two broke off and headed down another flight of stairs that were to Xander's right while he followed Spike to the left and through a set of double doors. Inside was a gym, with several mats stacked in a corner and weights placed carefully on shelves that ran the length of the room. Xander hid an explosive behind the mats.

Spike scowled and headed to the other end, where another set of doors led them to a changing room. This time, Spike held his hand up to his nose and rushed through to search for an exit.

"What's wrong?" Xander asked once they were back out in the corridor.

"The smell," Spike replied. "The soldiers are given a steroid in their food to help combat infections and increase muscle mass and so on. It comes out in their sweat."

Xander nodded and they rounded a corner. That would make sense if they were fighting demons and bringing them in every day. Some demons could carry more venom in them that a king cobra. Still, it was unnerving to know this wasn't just some mad scientist experiment - there were probably mad scientists in the building - but this was something that the government knew of and even funded. He was glad he hadn't decided to join after he left L.A. after all.

They hadn't come across anyone yet. It was starting to unnerve Xander that although this place was huge, they hadn't found a single body, demon or human. He expected the place to be overrun with people, soldiers and doctors alike. From what he'd seen on those videos, they specialized in experimenting on demons so why weren't there more people around?

Spike abruptly came to a halt and sniffed the air. Xander frowned at him as the demon pointed down a corridor that led to their left and brought his talon up to his face in a gesture of silence. Xander nodded his head and reached for his guns.

They had only gone maybe twenty feet before voices drifted along the corridor towards them. At first Xander couldn't make out what they were saying, but soon realized that there was another sound. Something was screaming.

Spike paused as they came to a corner and peered around. Xander checked back the way that they had come and turned back to Spike. Spike held up two fingers and peered around the bend again. Xander pulled out both his guns and two silencers out of his pocket. Quickly, he attached them and tugged on Spike's coat. Spike moved out of the way and Xander peered around the corner.

Standing in front of a door, were two soldiers with high-powered rifles held calmly across their chest. Carefully, Xander raised his guns, pointed them around the corner and aimed one at each soldier. One of them noticed him and he fired at both before they could react. Both bodies hit the floor at the same time.

Spike moved around him and was at the bodies, catching them both. Unfortunately, the door slid open and another soldier and a doctor came out. Spike lashed out at the soldier with his talon, gutting the man's belly and sliced the doctor's neck open with a knife that had appeared in his other hand. The body fell in the door and someone shouted. Xander fired at the next two bodies to come through the doorway as Spike slipped inside and Xander ran to the door before it could close and started to pull the dead soldiers and the doctor inside. The doctor was holding a hand to his neck and struggling to breathe. Xander raised a gun to the man's head and pulled the trigger.

"Nice," Spike said from behind him.

Xander turned to find that Spike was standing with a soldier in front of him. His talon had come straight through the man's chest. Spike curled his lip as he pulled his arm out and the soldier fell to the ground.

"Hate the smell of these buggers," Spike grumbled as he searched his pockets with his hand.

Xander took a look around the room and realized it must have been some sort of control room. There were monitors lined against one wall with several chairs in front of the desk that ran in front of them. Blood covered most of the walls and bodies littered the floor. Xander carefully picked his way over them and scanned the screens. One showed a white corridor, another showed two more soldiers standing guard over a door that looked similar to the one they'd just come through, and a third screen showed a bird's eye view of an operating theatre. It looked like a human body was open on the table.

Xander moved on to the next screen as Spike lit a cigarette behind him.

"What are you looking for?"

"Nothing," Xander replied. He scanned two more screens and found two more sterile white corridors. The last screen made him stop and stare. On the wall was a picture of Riley Finn's dead body.

"What the bloody hell?" Spike mumbled around his cigarette. He moved forward for a closer look as a voice crackled over the speakers.

"_Sir? The body." _

Xander stared at the screen for a moment before pressing a button. Before Spike could ask him what he was doing, or stop him, he spoke aloud, "Burn it."

"_Yes, sir,"_ the voice answered. Onscreen a moment later, Spike and Xander watched as liquid was thrown over the body and a bright flicker of light traveled across the screen to land squarely in the middle of the back. A moment later, the whole body was on fire.

Spike held a talon up to his lips in a gesture of silence and turned to the door. Xander grabbed a few clips of ammo off one of the soldiers and a pistol and followed Spike out the door and down the corridor. The corridor slowly became wider around them, allowing them to walk side by side until they came to one of the underground caverns. Down at the bottom, doctors were milling around, tending to soldiers and demons alike. The demons, of course, strapped to tables that dotted the floor while they were guarded by at least two soldiers each.

Xander glanced across at Spike. The demon nodded and began to head back down the corridor they'd just come through. Xander spied the charge on the wall where Spike had been standing and headed after him. So far, no one had noticed either of them. They seemed more concerned with the enraged crocodile that had just skidded across the floor and was snapping at everything within reach of its powerful jaws.

Quickly, Xander followed Spike back through the building, and up through the vents to the surface and into the cemetery where the two demons were standing guard over the vent and inside a circle of blood on the ground. Spike scratched at his lizard side with his talons and looked at the vampire.

"What happened?"

"The wolf found us," the vampire answered. "We made the circle to ward him off."

"How long?" Spike asked.

"Not ten minutes ago." The vampire turned and pointed towards the path that ran through the cemetery. "He went that way, probably out to get the slayer."

"Yeah," Spike reached into his pocket again and pulled out his cigarettes. He lit one up and turned to Xander. "You gonna be alright, mate?"

Xander nodded.

"I'll be fine, but you might want to skip town. Things are gonna get messy round here."

"I'll bet," Spike replied. "See you round."

Before Xander could reply, the demon was gone. He let out a sigh and reached into the bag he'd left on the ground. It looked like the demons had tried to get into it; the vampire had burned one hand pretty badly on the cross and the snake demon had attempted to rip it open, only to be stopped by the spell on the material that was now stained with blood. Xander let out a sigh, now's the fun part, he thought as he glanced up at the sky. It looked like he only had a couple of hours before the sun rose and he wanted to leave as soon as he could so that if Buffy found out that he had killed Finn, she wouldn't come after him for it. He rummaged around in the bag until he'd found what he needed and froze.

He heard footsteps behind him. Light and gentle, trying not to make a sound but the slight rustle of denim gave the owner away in an instant. It looked like his luck had just run out.

"How'd you find me?" he asked, resisting the urge to reach for his gun. He still needed a few more minutes to piece together the detonator so he could blow that hell hole up and be done with it.

"Willow found a spell," Buffy answered softly. He heard her stop a few feet away. "We found a Guardian, here in Sunnydale."

Xander slipped a hand into his pocket, fingering the butt of his gun and didn't reply.

"She told us that you'd been working with a partner."

"And you want me to give them up?" Xander risked a glance over his shoulder at her. "Sorry, Buff, not gonna happen."

He turned back to the wires in his hands and quickly finished wiring them up while she glared at the back of his head.

"She also told us that you killed Riley." He heard her take a step forward but didn't turn. "Is that true?"

Xander sighed and turned to look at his old friend. She had buried her hands deep in the pockets of the denim jacket she was wearing and was looking at him like she hoped she was wrong. She wanted to be wrong, he realized. She wanted the Guardian to have been lying. She reminded him of another little girl who had once believed all was right with the world and nothing could ever go wrong. And how wrong had it gone? He closed his eyes and forced his memories back into the box at the back of his mind.

"It is true, isn't it?"

He wanted to scream. Instead, he eyed her coolly.

"Yeah, it's true. I killed him."

She looked down at the ground, tears crusting the corners of her eyes before she pushed them back and looked at the wires behind him. He fingered the detonator in his hand. She shook her head slightly and then frowned at him.

"What are you doing?"

"Did you know what they did?"

"Xander, what are you doing?"

Her voice was more urgent now, and he smiled at her. She had that look in her eyes, the same one she'd had years ago when he was supposed to tell her about Willow casting the spell on Angel. He hadn't told her then, for fear she would be distracted during her fight. Well, that was most of it. A tiny part of him had wanted her to just kill the vampire and end the suffering for everyone involved, especially hers.

"Do you know how far the Initiative goes?"

She was coming forward now, moving towards him, determined to take him down. Probably without hurting him too.

"Do you?" he replied coldly.

She narrowed her eyes.

"Xander, you don't want to do this."

He froze.

"_Xander, you don't want to do this! Don't fight with me!"_

He pulled the gun from his pocket.

"_You don't want to do this!"_

He aimed.

"Xander?"

And fired.

Buffy jerked once. Twice. Looked down at her chest. Back up at him. Frowned.

He hit the button and the world exploded.

Tbc…


	15. Chapter Fifteen

Disclaimer: Buffy and all characters you recognise do not belong to me. Any you don't recognise are mine.

**Soldier**

**Chapter Fifteen**

All around him was darkness. He didn't know what was up or what was down, but there was one thing that he was sure of: he was still alive. If he was dead, he would be in Hell by now for sure. Instead, he was trapped in this darkness, with the loud pounding of his heart echoing in his ears. And if his heart beat wasn't a reminder that he was still a part of the land of the living then he wasn't sure what was.

His head ached, his body felt like lead, and he only remembered snatches of what had happened. He had felt the ground shaking beneath his feet, and then he'd been falling, but how far he fell, or how long he didn't know, only that the second he landed, pain flashed through his body as dirt and rocks fell on top of him. Effectively, he was buried alive. He had no idea which way was up, or which way was down, only that he was lying on something soft, and warm.

He struggled to move, pins and needles were starting to creep up his legs, chasing away the numbness like they had the night that he'd used the chaos winds. Beneath him, the soft thing he was lying on groaned and he looked in the way that he assumed was down, at it. Pulling at his arms, he managed to get his hands free and carefully reached out. He felt soft hair and skin underneath his fingertips, a face, and warm breath ghosted against his skin.

Buffy.

He rolled off of her as best as he could, which wasn't that much considering the small space that they were trapped in and tried to gather his bearings. He had no clue what way was up and which was down. His blood was pounding around his skull as he tried to remember the best way to find out. Oh yeah, you spit. He did so and grimaced when it landed right on his face. He wiped it off with the back of his hand and looked straight ahead into the darkness. Was that really the way up?

Buffy groaned, and he felt something warm and wet against his side. It was then that he remembered that he had shot her. He must've lost his gun in the fall because he couldn't feel it nearby as he stretched out his arms to look for it.

Cursing, he coughed when his hands shifted a large pile of dust and focused on his predicament. He had to find a way to dig himself out otherwise he would be dead soon. Bringing his hands up, he started to claw at the earth above him, spitting when dirt landed in his open mouth. His hands encountered roots and large rocks that he had to shove out the way.

Slowly, he started to form a hole, and shoved all the dirt to one side as he managed to get to his feet. Buffy coughed when some of the falling dirt landed on her face and he looked down at her, wandering whether he should try and get her out as well. Mentally, he slapped himself, of course, he should help her; she had saved his ass plenty of times in the past, so there should be no reason why he shouldn't help her now to help repay her. Except now she wasn't his friend, the woman he had had a secret crush on. Now, she was an enemy, but she was also the slayer. After all that she had done, she shouldn't have to die like this.

Once again cursing his conscience – which seemed to have re-grown since he'd returned to town – he reached down and moved her to on one side of the hole, mindful of her wound and out of the way of any falling stones. If he had a light or something, he would have tended to the bleeding, but as it was, the best he could do was get her to the surface and hope that she would hang on. He really didn't want another friend to die in his arms again, that had been painful enough the first time round, and he wasn't sure he could make it if it happened again.

Wiping away the tears that had fallen, he pushed on, scraping at the ground above him and hoping that it wasn't too far to the surface. As he went and more earth fell, it filled up the space beneath his feet, and he was able to stamp on it so it provided a foothold for him as he went.

After what felt like forever, his hands finally broke through the surface. Carefully propping Buffy against the wall of the tunnel that he had dug, he cleared the hole and managed a smile up at the sky above him.

Climbing out of the tunnel proved to be a hard job. The ground was soft and gave way easily every time Xander tried to hoist himself out of it. Eventually, he found a root that had to belong to an old tree and hefted himself up out of the hole. After taking a moment to catch his breath, he leaned back in and reached down to pull Buffy up. In the early light of day, her face was ashen and tinged with blue. She had lost a lot of blood, and he wasn't sure whether she would make it or not.

He glanced around, hoping that someone would come and help him out. All he saw was rocky ground in every direction, and a couple of fallen trees scattered here and there. He had blown the charges in the cemetery, he remembered with a grimace, and if his memory was correct, the cemetery was right over that massive underground cavern, or one of them.

Cursing, he looked down at her wound. The bleeding had stopped and it had crusted over, but he highly doubted that she would make it. He knew that if the bullet had been a through and through then he might have a chance to save her, but when he checked, he found no exit wound on her back.

"I'm sorry," he whispered, gently laying her back down on the ground. He knew that this was no way for her to die, but he couldn't just let her walk away knowing that her one time best friend was now a murderer either. She really did deserve a better way to die, but he wasn't sure what he could do to help her.

Silently, he looked down at his hands, he knew maybe one or two healing techniques, but both were really for dealing with poison and small cuts, nothing on the scale of a bullet wound. Maybe, though, he thought as he placed a hand over the wound and the other on her chest to help her breathe. Muttering an incantation in Latin, he tried to heal her, but only succeeded in almost closing the wound and sealing the bullet inside her. Quickly, he pulled his hands away and curled them into fists.

This was stupid; she needed a doctor, a proper certified surgeon in order to get the bullet out successfully. And that was one thing that he wasn't.

He looked round, silently hoping that someone would magically appear and help her out so that he could now go. His job in Sunnydale was done, and now he could leave. Preferably soon before someone could discover what he'd done. No one came.

He slipped out of his jacket and carefully wrapped her in it. She didn't move at all. That would have worried him, had it not been for the strong pulse underneath his fingertips. Slowly, he picked her up, cradling her to his chest and started to walk.

Straight ahead of him, the sky was becoming lighter, the grey-blue slowly turning to pink above him, a sure sign that he was heading east. Away from the ocean, and towards the heart of the town, where he knew he was sure to find someone that could help him. A mist formed low on the ground and swirled around his feet as he stepped through it.

The sun was glaring down at him from a clear sky by the time he found a street. It was deserted, and with a clear crack down the middle, but it was still a street. He frowned at the collapsed houses around him, wandering just how big the underground facility had been. At the very least, half the town seemed to have disappeared. He followed the street for a while, and it didn't take him long to find someone, although it wasn't the person he expected.

Tara's eyes were wide with worry as she rushed towards him. Behind her, a team of paramedics were attending to a woman lying on the ground.

"Is she...?"

He could only shake his head, too tired to speak. He carefully shifted Buffy in his arms. Tara stroked her hair gently and the slayer groaned softly. Xander crouched down, wincing when his knees cracked and set Buffy on the ground. She groaned again.

"Buffy?" Tara kept her voice quiet, and gently placed a hand on Buffy's face.

Xander watched as Buffy tried to move and cried out in pain. Blood was starting to seep through her shirt again. Tara hadn't noticed yet. He glanced up at the paramedics as they hurried towards him. One asked if he was alright.

"I'm… fine," he told them and waved them off. The guy looked doubtful, but one of the others called to him and as they crowded round the slayer, he took the opportunity to sneak away.

Not far behind the ambulance, a number of people had gathered, some slightly hurt but mostly they were unharmed. He knew that these were people who had managed to escape the explosives. He slipped under the tape that cordoned off the road and within moments, he was lost in the crowd.

It didn't take him long to reach more people. Hundreds of them had fled the collapsed area, almost like they'd known it was coming. He heard whispers as he passed among them. Some thought it was an earthquake, and others were saying it was a gas explosion. Even now, he was still amazed that the people of Sunnydale didn't know about the demons and goings on of the dark. Everyone seemed eager to let it all pass and try and get on with their lives though.

The buses were out, and he was too far from the wharf to even consider trying to leave by sea. He also had no idea where his car was, it may have fallen into the "blast zone" as several news crews were calling it, but then again… it might not have. He headed towards the other side of town and out towards L.A. and was relieved when he found his car sitting on the side of the road next to the 'You are now leaving Sunnydale' sign.

He rounded the car and got inside. On the front passenger seat was an envelope with an airline ticket in it. LAX to Boston. One way. He only had two and a half hours to catch the flight. He threw the envelope back onto the seat and started the car. An hour later his phone rang.

"So you figured it out after all." Ethan chuckled.

Xander tightened his grip on the wheel.

"This was supposed to be a vacation."

"Orders are orders." Ethan replied, sounding much more serious now. "I hope you like New York."

Xander silently groaned. Ethan was silent for a moment. Xander could hear paper rustling on the other end.

"By the way, did you check your seat before you sat down?"

"What?"

"I'm going to take that as a no."

Ethan hung up. Xander took the phone away from his ear and frowned at it, wandering what the other man meant by check the seat. He shifted and reached underneath him, frowning when his fingers connected with another envelope. Still wandering, he opened it with one hand and pulled out the contents.

The first was a picture, of Buffy, holding something in her arms. When he took a closer look, he saw she was holding a baby, and smiling at the camera. His stomach dropped as he remembered Willow telling him that Buffy had been pregnant.

The second was a copy of a birth certificate. This made him pull over so that he could look over it properly. Buffy and Finn were named as mother and father, but it still stunned him to see it in print.

Casey Joyce Summers.

There was also a third picture, of a little girl that looked just like Buffy, laughing while someone pushed her on a swing. She could've only been two or three years old.

He stared at the pictures and certificate for ages. Buffy and Finn had had a child, and he'd killed Finn, and Buffy was probably not going to survive the bullet wound that he had given her… He put the certificate and pictures back into the envelope and pulled away. The joy of escaping left him and in its place sat something he hadn't felt in years: regret. Regret over the two lives he had taken, and the life of the little girl whose life he'd just destroyed.

**End**

AN- So here we are. The end. This story has been killing me for nearly two years now and finally, it's over. A part of me wants to scream and dance with joy but there will be more to come in this universe. That I can promise. Muse seems to have taken a liking to this darker Xander. Thank you everyone who has read and reviewed this story, and to those who have read and not reviewed… well, thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed.


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